Ilovehishma

My Baby Girl is Here, Alhamdulilah

2011-12-05T12:06:00.000-08:00

Alhamdulilah, all praise and glory be to Allah, my baby girl was born just before fajr Eid Al Adha morning, healthy. Her mama survived the ordeal basically mentally stable and in one peice (although having frightened the doctors and nurses by threatening to cut herself open in the hallway if they didn't get the baby out moments before the delivery and talking to people who weren't ever there about tea). I am all recovered now, just getting used to feedings and all that.

Forgive me for my lack of time to post or respond to comments or even to post them. I am barely surviving eating all my meals a day, keeping the house clean and laundry done, and getting my hair and makeup done and wearing clothes that match without baby vomit on them.

Thanks to Aalia and S who were there when my water broke (which is totally the grosest thing ever), ready to drive me to the hospital, and my habibi, who apparently I kept calling useless throughout the whole ordeal because he wouldn't get me a knife to cut the baby out with or a doctor who'd do it for me lol.

I think my daughter will look alot like Leighton Meester when she grows up, judging by her colouring and features [I may change my opinion later]. I am not going to post her pic on the blog or say what name we picked but our nickname for her is Zz.

Not much else to tell. The BM blog is still not finished or open, but I won't close ILH till it is. I am just not posting anything much here for now. Please forgive.

UPDATES

2011-10-12T09:57:00.000-07:00

Asalaam alaykom ramatullahi wa barakato ladies,

Please forgive my absence. I have been hosting guests, getting ready for the baby (on my budget everything is a do-it-yourself project), and just been rather tired from the pregnancy. I am like a turtle. When I am on my back, I can't get up without rolling over to my side and getting up on my hands and knees. TOTALLY awesome. The whole ordeal is very tiring. So mentally, I haven't been up to writing anything worth reading research-wise. And stylistically beyond trying to decorate the nursery with what I already have on hand? I have gone from a size 0 to a size fourteen because of my belly and since the weight gain is majority from the baby I don't see the point of buying any new clothes when my shape is going to change dramatically in a week or two.

Good news? I HAVE been cleaning up "Beautiful Muslimah" blog and will re-open it. "I love Hishma" will be integrated into BM, and then I will close Ilove Hishma and only BM and the Bride Wears Hijab blogs will run.

Let me know what you think?

Don't worry, you won't loose any of the existing content in the switch.

Eid Mubarak: and my Eid outfits

2011-08-31T11:28:00.000-07:00

Eid Mubarak everyone, sorry I haven't had time to post anything of much import recently. I hope you are all having a safe and happy Eid weekend. I am, alhamdulilah. Just thought I'd share my Eid outfits this year as I haven't done a good fashion-ey post in a while. Not that I am am that fashionable at the moment lugging my watermelon of a pregnancy around. Thus the abayas raas which does hide the new curves I've gained for the most part. I got it embroidered in gold with a bisht style which I just love.

My Eid house dress was an Omani traditional one I sewed myself. It is worn around women for visiting only, but is hijab on top because the doors of rooms are open and men might walk by in the halls. My other Eid dress is a white jalabiyia we got from a Syrian vendor in an exhibition stall. My husband really likes white dresses and I am good at bartering and it fit my price range so it became Eid dress number two for the second day of the holiday. There is also a third holiday Eid day in Oman but for that I wear regular abaya as it involves going to areas around non-family members and what not and I wear niqab anyways soooooo.... but so far we are all having a great time and I have eaten too much steak/mishakeek.

How was your Eid?

Cute Ramadaan Or Eid Decorating Ideas

2011-08-09T01:29:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd do a post on decorating for Ramadan since I haven't had time to write an Islamic post, and I leave sisters who can actually cook to write iftar recipe posts. But one thing I CAN do... I decorate. For me, when I lived in a non-Muslim country and there weren't alot of Muslims around, it helped to get me into the spirit. And I think, if you have children who are younger and not fasting, it is one way to make them get into the spirit of the holiday without over comercializing it, and helping them contribute to it. I saw this "gift cookie" on www.ramadanchallenge.com and thought it was such a great idea to give dawah about what Ramadan is about for neighbors, co-workers ect. Having your kids give them out to your neighbors is a cute idea. It is a card you can print out from their website and the back of the card explains what Ramadan is and what the purpose is. As Muslims we are supposed to care for our neighbors, Muslim or not. This is a sunnah.Decorating with hanging cookies? I would DEFINATELY DO this for Eid morning for my kids (which I am waiting on at the moment, but next year, InshaAllah;) ).A great Eid or Ramadan craft project for adults OR kids, is to write little Ramadan and Eid Mubarak cards. I love to save scraps of fabric, wrapping paper, and card stock, for these sort of things, and as a Muslim, it is a duty to us to tell someone if they mean something to us. For me, I tend to do this clearer and in writing. These cards are easy for kids to cut and glue together, and they also make cute places for kids to write "ramadan reminders", i.e ayat & hadith, for friends and family.In our house we use a centerpiece of real Arabic glass lanterns, but if you don't have these, these are really cute and easy to make, from kids to teens. It makes the kids feel special to come home from taraweeah salat and see a lantern outside on the front step to greet them.And if you happen to use squashes, gourds, melons, or pumpkins to make desserts, foods, and snacks, during the holy month, don't waste them, they make beautiful lanterns if you carve them and put votive candles inside! My family LOVE pumpkin seeds, pumpkin pie, and orange and pumpkin soup, so if pumpkins are cheap and in season, I indulge.And even though I haven't baked desserts of any kind this Ramadaan, I had to include blogger Umm Khaled's absolutely adorable Ramadan pie!

More cute Ramadan food presentation ideas. I especially love the sandwich cut with the cookie cutter. My oldest stepson is practicing fasting for the first time this year, and he usually breaks his fast by noon. This sandwich would be so cute to give to him along with a great healthy Ramadan classic recipe soup;) ----there are so many but I am a fan of harira for life!!!!Make these weeeellllll before Ramadan, but if you don't have a traditional Arabic tea or coffee pot, why not make these ADORABLE tea cosies????????Definately for Eid it is a tradition to give sadaqah and gifts to those in need, those who live close to you, and those you love. I love when kids take toys of theirs that are brand new but that they don't play with, wrap them up, and give them to other kids! Us adults, tend to give food and candies, and money.

Have any leftover decorations from weddings, graduations, ect, or your non-Muslim Christmas days? So long as they aren't pagan, re-use them. I resuse the blown glass Christmas bulbs because they have a sentimental meaning for me, but aren't pagan-in-origin like the Christmas tree or angel ornaments ect. And they look so pretty put into bowls or hung from the ceiling:D

Paper streamers, signs, and streamers are very pretty and easy to make. Have kids record all ayaat and hadith on different peices of paper and then string them together to form a garland! Those are all my fave ideas so far.

visit www.barakahlifehandmade.typepad.com for more creative Islamic-based crafts;)

Pixie's Ramadaan: Personal Updates

2011-08-08T23:42:00.000-07:00

Asalaam alaykom ramatullahi wa barakto ladies,: So sorry I haven't updated alot. I don't use net regularily even when not fasting, and it is hard to make time for it when I am trying to get to my Ramadaan goals: read the whole Qu'ran, memorize 3 new surahs, make all my sunnah prayers and do some extra dhikr and get on my duas (I am lazy at duas). That, and prepare Iftar meals, clean up, make sure husband gets up, animals get fed, and I respond to any greetings anyone has sent me. And before Ramadaan I was quite ill. I was having a heart condition related to the pregnancy, that has alhamdulilah, gone away now that I have been taking it easier. I am not allowed to walk for more than 10 minutes at a time just to keep the stress off the heart. Thus also, I haven't been able to take any more orders for the BeautifulMuslimahOnlineBoutique for the meantime. For those of you who sent me the first inqueries and recieved your abaya orders, thank you for your patience while I negotiated with the tailors;). [BTW, don't you just love how I have keenly hid my baby bump with our centerpiece lantern?]So, to answer the first of the many comment questions I haven't gotten around to answering yet, there is a big difference between fasting in Oman as opposed to fasting in Canada. In Oman, Islam is the major religion, and non-Muslims and those not fasting are actually requested not to eat, drink, smoke, chew gum, et all, in public. Which is ridiculous to me as Islam doesn't actually rule this, but almost all the expats respect it. I mean, if they have to eat they run to the bathroom and scarf down a bagel behind the bathroom stall doors in the mall. Also, for the men I guess it is easier, as women here tend to dress alot more modestly, even the expatriots, even though Oman has no enforced dress code. The Masjids proivde free suhoor and iftar for those less privellaged, there are sadaqah collection boxes everywhere, and anyone Muslim gets shortened working hours. There are Mosques on almost every street so going to and from Taraweeah prayers should be easy for everyone. These are the benefits that alas, Canada did not have. But unlike Canada, due to the large muslim population, you also get the "cultural" fasters. They overeat, don't pray, sleep all day, show-off by overdoing meals and buying new cars and clothes ect..... Yeah, not really doing anything but not eating. Not exactly Ramadaan.Question #2 {wa alaykom e salaam ramatullahi wa barakto Anna;)}: what is my take on fasting while pregnant? Well, for me personally, I don't believe it is obligatory to do so, but if one is at a stage in their pregnancy where they and the baby are healthy enough to sustain the fast, they should fast, as there is so much reward in Ramadaan, really, you wouldn't want to miss it if you didn't have to. Due to health reasons, I haven't been able to fast every day of Ramadaan so far. But I have, alhamdulilah, managed to fast more days than I haven't. For me, choosing not to fast depends on a few things. #1, if I start to have any health complications such as low blood sugar or blood pressure levels, heart palpatations, feigntness of breath, seeing splotches, or migraine headaches. All these are signs of "you can't fast now". #2 I throw up. Throwing up breaks the fast anyways so even if I intended to fast if I throw up, I call the fast off. #3 If the baby is hungry. I can tell my hunger pains from the baby's at this stage in the pregnancy. When the baby is hungry she makes me feel like I will be sick. If I am hungry it is a pain in my chest up to my throat. Also, the baby's hunger pains are accompanied by heartburn. Mine are not. This would differ between pregnant women but I know my body well enough to know what is me and what is the baby. #4 If one has to take any mandatory day time medications. I don't, so this doesn't effect my ability to fast. Those are the things that decide if I should fast or not. I also find, if you are pregnant, eating Suhoor is a must, AT LEAST a small cup of water, and 3 dates. The baby needs that or it will be tooooo hungry to healthily make it until magraib.
What is Pixie's average iftar?: My average iftar is very, very simple. It consists of dried omani dates (pitted or stuffed with almonds), water, fresh milk, fresh mango juice, sliced fruit (my baby loves plums and melon, her Mommy loves kiwi, and her baba loves grapes and apples), either bresh baked bread or samboosas, and some sweet treat (I like chocolate mamoul or puddings). Later, after magraib salat, we might eat a meat dish, or a soup and salad. For suhoor, since I am still throwing up in the mornings if I eat certain things, I limit myself to water, dates, and sliced melon, or some tomatoe juice. Nothing fancy.

Ramadaan Kareem!!!!

2011-07-31T09:37:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to wish everyone of you a lovely and happy (and healthy) inshaAllah, Ramadaan. Seek the benefits of this month, and carry them with you into the new year:).

Pixie's Wish List Summer 2011

2011-07-05T02:56:00.000-07:00

-I need new sandals that are stylish AND supportive. How come support equals uuuuuuglllllllly?!!!

-#1 purse of the year is anything with structure in the colour "kiwi"

-new sunglasses.

-pink tinted lipgloss

Pixie's Personal Style: Orange Ballet flats and Clutch with black abaya

2011-07-05T02:08:00.000-07:00

My obsession with orange began when my sister in law gave me a gift of the cutest orange ballet flats. I alreeady had a lovely orange purse but I saw a clutch I just adored, and then that was it. Pair with a relatively simple black abaya and flip niqab, my signature black and white cocktail rings, and beige, grey or white underneath it all.

Pixie's Personal Style 2011---my maternity ventures

2011-07-04T22:47:00.000-07:00

I have started having a thing for elegantly cut but plain black abayas and shaylas because I have of late been wearing niqab rather full-time here in Oman [where I live in Oman no one really wears niqab at all]. {I love my stringless layered flip niqab from Al Motahajiba-thank you habibixoxo}. Also, they have a lasting quality, the way few of my more trendier embellished abayas have got.

These next few sets will highlight a few of my personal accessories (that I own in real life) and ones I'd add.

I have always loved Leopard but fear it becomming trashy, so I usually stick to a leopard print purse or trench coat. But in the Gulf, women are fearless of leopard {not that they have the fashion saavy to prevent style disasters they just perhaps are as innocent as children playing dress up, the sheild of the black abaya ever at hand to prevent public disasters????}.

In Oman, everybody wears leopard. People are okay mixing it with florals, glitter, even other non-matching prints of Leopard. Another big trend is the jumpsuit. Which looked good on a size zero me, but preggo? I know curvier girls like Kim Kardashian are wearing it just fine, but for maternity I wondered could I pull it off? [I don't believe the jumpsuit is a lasting trend but neither are maternity clothes so now seemed the time to be daring since if it went out of style suddenly I'd have the excuse of a shrinking belly to to ditch it in a few months right?]. To be honest, not trusting my instincts, I googled the following pics to reassure myself: Seems it would be totally okay, so long as I has a cute thin belt, and some neutral wedges. And everything that could be made trashy is made classy with Hermes Birken bag right? {I love you habibi, for my beloved "pinkie"}. I actually don't follow the "brands make it better" philosophy but for a few months I think it would be okay to be a bit more wild. I know my diet is.

For shoes and accessories, Sahara beiges are in for the season (and last forever anyways as neutrals), so I will go with a low beige wedge with lots of support for my aching pregnancy feet (why they ache when I don't walk much anymore I don't know?).

Whether they are out of in, chandelier earrings (Omanis don't wear alot) and cocktail rings are my thing and I love them forever. I buy the cheapest but nicest looking I can find;).

With a jumper that is strapless like mine, unless you find the perfect wrap or knit to go over top, a big chunky necklace is needed. I have lots as I have a thing for tribal Yemeni and Omani jewelry. But the Chanel 2011 one in my fashion set? That one is so classic, very art noveau. My father would love it, when the prices of Birkens, and trends of leopard print and jumpsuits make him gag.

With pregnency my love of scents has also changed (I don't wear perfume out of the home ladies, ever). My favourite bukhour (insence) frankinsence makes me sick (but overhwhelming oud now doesn't) and perfumes that I once loved (sorry Chanel Chance) make me woozy. Stronger scents that once gave me a headache come in loud and clear and without the nasty side effects, but the only one my husband and I can agree on right now is Dior Chere. Which unfortunately got used up. I'll wait after the baby to invest again because I am sure my tastes will change.

Speak the Truth [and what covering your sins means]

2011-07-04T11:52:00.000-07:00

Almost all of us know this hadith: "All the sins of my followers [those sins that are repented from and not repeated] will be forgiven except for those which are disclosed to the people. For example, a person commits a sin at night and Allah conceals is for him, and in the morning he goes to the people and says 'I did such-and-such evil deed." And yet, less well known, Rasoolulah sallalahu alahi wa salaam, Mohammed, also told us "To speak the truth, even if it is against you?" So what does covering your sins really mean?

Covering your sins means not bragging about them, or speaking about them without being asked about them.

But if you are asked? [BTW, no Muslim should seek out the sins of another Muslim unless they have fear for their life, safety, ect, 2 cases where is being allowed the Prophet S.A.W suggested negotiations for marriage and business partnership deals as cases].

In cases where you are asked about past wrongs/sins you ARE to speak the truth about yourself, but offer no more than what you are asked. For instance, a woman asks a man if he committed zinaa before they marry. Many men lie about this, but this brother understood properly that "covering" one's sins does not give us permission to "lie" about them when confronted with questions about them. He told this sister the truth, that he had done haraam in his past but had reformed and never wanted to do such again and was properly ashamed. She forgave him, and they married (after some medical tests to screen for STDs ect). This IS proper is Islamic manners. Lying isn't, and never is. I also know of one sister who admitted the same to a good Muslim brother and he forgave her likewise;)

Covering one's sins simply means having the proper shame for them. Don't go out speaking about them, or you make them lighter, you might make them seem "less shameful". The first step towards repentence is having a realization that your actions are wrong and have shame for them. But not to add more sin to yourself by LYING about them. Me, personally, I don't want to have more people standing accusing me on the day of judgement for lies, ect.

The Definition of the Term Khawarij to the Ibadhis

2011-06-17T07:31:00.000-07:00

Who are the Khawarij to the Ibadhis?

To the Ibadhis, to go out out from the religion of Islam has nothing directly to do with political rebellion, be it legal or illegal rebellion. It is based soley upon the rejection of the fixed Shariah laws practiced by the Prophet Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam, or committing acts against the set of prescribed binding laws for religious practice, like the prolonged abandonment of prayer or acts of worship for others than Allah alone. Thus they do no consider their practice of Islam to be out of the confines of Islam. If they had used the definition of rebelling against a right (or even wrong) leader, then they would have been Khawarij and labelled Uthman's killers, Talhah & al-Zubair, and Muawiyah as such.

Logical definition, which gets rid of the necessity of having to define what a "right leader" is in order to understand the term Khawarij, unlike my Sunni sources.

So do the Ibadhi consider anyone to be Khawarij?

Yes, they consider the Azariqah Sect and its supporters to be Khawarij because Nafi Al-Azraq made the mistake of deriving a religious ruling from a single peice of [misunderstood by him when taken out of context] Islamic evidence, rather than the volume of evidence in sunnah of the Prophet Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam's lifetime.

The Ibadhi believe that the Azariqah sect has gone out of the religion because they have rejected the shariah that guards that a Muslim's personage is safe unless they should apostate. [Osama Bin Laden falls into this category for example, as he believes killing innocent civilians and even Muslims to be okay by rationalization of out-of-context Qu'ran quotes not within the example of the Shariah laws set out by Rasoolulah Mohamed].

In such an example of saying that the Azariqah are khawarij, how is that rationalized?

The Azariqah believe that if a Muslim commits a major or minor sin, then it is lawful to shed their blood, capture their pocessions, and enslave their women and children, as it is quoted in the Qu'ran in Surah al-An'am, ayah 121: "And if you obey them you verily are surely polytheists [ie disbelievers, apostates]". Thus the Azariqah believe that Muslim believers [and innocent civilians] became/become apostates/polytheists when they committed/commit sins, even very minor ones.

The Ibadhi (and Sunni me, and all the Shia ladies that I know personally know) do not believe such rationalizing is correct. Firstly, the ayah is in context of telling us to eat halal meat, and that Allah compares those who do not follow His clearly prescribed conditions to the disbelievers. Secondly, and most importantly, there were Muslims alive during the Prophet Mohamed's [sallalalhu alahi wa salaam] time who used to commit sins, even major ones, but they were not subject to the laws for militant disbelievers who attacked the Muslims, or of Muslim apostates. Thus such a ruling is cleaaaaaaaaaarly imcompatible with the Shariah itself, and is a rejection of the foundations of the Shariah.

If one is to follow the Azariqah school of thought, all manner of horrors and attrocities can be committed upon the Ummah [Muslim nation and others friendly to us]. Jealous of your neighbor and want his lands? Find a small fault in him and then murder him, it's okay. That woman from your village who won't marry you? Fine. Point out that headscarf doesn't go quite enough over her breasts, and take her as your slave. She's not a Muslim afterall then is she? Or we could go with Osama. Any Muslim whose not fighting America deserves to die because they are personally responsible for their government's killing of Palestinians. Scary, the result of such a rejection of the sunnah, and shariah, isn't it?

To the Ibadhi the Azariqah are not Khawarij because they seceded from Ali R.A after the arbitration, or because they rebelled against the Umayyads. They are Khawarij because they misinterpreted verses from the Qu'ran, which in turn led them to commit acts of wickedness, and to invalidate laws. To the Ibadhi, rebellion against a Caliph or an Imam does not result in the renuncification of Islam, even if those who do so are deemed disobedient, sinful, or aggressors from within the contexts of Shariah law.

Conclusion:

To the Ibadhi Sect's school of thought, Muslims only become Khawarij through their deeds [acts of apostasy as defined by Allah's & His Messenger] and doctrines [that reject the Shariah and thus the Messenger and the Quran], but not rebellion in itself, or sins that did not lead to apostasy.

Come follow the Bride Wears Hijab blog if...

2011-06-15T12:59:00.000-07:00

Please come follow www.bridewearshijab.blogspot.com if you are looking for fashion sets and shopping links for abayas ect, as I haven't had much time to make these of ILH recently;)

I am expecting... a girl! :D

2011-06-09T17:04:00.001-07:00

I finally found out the sex of the baby... it's a girl!!!!!!!!!!! Alhamdulilah. InshaAllah she is born healthy and a good Muslimah, ameen.

So now I am thinking of names. These are what we have so far. Feel free to leave your suggestions. But remember, it has to be sensible in Arabic, and can't sound dirty or stupid in English either. Which alas, alot of Arabic girls names do.

ARABIC NAMES

Amatullah- female servant of Allah [I like]

Fatimah, Fatoum - accustom, Prophet Mohamed's daughter [I like]

Izdihar, Izdihaar - Flourishing, blossoming [I like]

Nashwa - Fragrance, perfume, that which intoxicates

Nuwayrah - Small fire

Sabriyah - Patient

Tamadur - Brilliant [I like]

PERSIAN NAMES

Afsahneh- A fairy tale [I like]

Roxanna- the dawn, Persian Princess married to Alexander the Great

And I guess I should add the names: Mariam, Khadijah, Asiya, Ruqayah, Zaenab, Narjis, Saffiyah, Sumaiya, Sara, Salma, Asma, Aisha, (most famous of the names) are already out, due to too many people I know having them. I am looking for less common and more beautiful sounding names, but I take into account meaning as well.

The Bride Wears Hijab is finally re-opened

2011-06-03T12:15:00.000-07:00

Due to so many requests for me to open or invite people to the "Bride Wears Hijab" blog and "Beautiful Muslimah" I have been working on updating and fixing both blogs up. I have finally finished the bride blog;) so here is the link in case any of you forgot www.bridewearshijab.blogspot.com [Alas, any old comments could NOT be erased due to a weird blog error so if they don't make sense, that makes sense since the posts got bounced into a different order]. As for BM, I actually never planned to re-open it but to put all the posts into ILH. So I will get on that. Eventually. ;) So see what I've managed so far on the bride blog and bear with me on getting the BM stuff in here. Eventually. InshaAllah.

Real Life Wedding#17: Blogger StyleCovered's Walimah

2011-06-02T08:18:00.001-07:00

All photos taken from http://www.stylecovered.com/ . Love the blue colour on this particular sister mashaAllah.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Weddings #16: White Wedding Dress & Hijab

2011-06-02T08:01:00.000-07:00

MashaAllah I like almost everything about this wedding. Especially how she has pinned the back of her hijab and the smiling couple, mashaAllah:)

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #15: white wedding dress & simple hijab

2011-06-02T07:37:00.000-07:00

I am sorry I don't know the name of the sister, but mashaAllah at the boy leading the procession by reciting Qu'ran is very sweet.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan your wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #14: Red & Green

2011-06-02T07:30:00.001-07:00

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Weddings #13: Hijab with Asian Bridal Wear for Nikah and Walimah

2011-06-02T07:24:00.000-07:00

One sister's pink, white and silver nikah outfit.

Red and green for her walimah.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Weddings #12: Princess Shahirah Aishah of Malaysia's Nikah

2011-06-02T06:48:00.000-07:00

Getting ready.The bride & her father.At the nikah ceremony in the Masjid.She looks excited and very happy.Princess Shahirah of Malaysia's nikah ceremony.

If you would like to help sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #11: Sabrina from Slice of Lemon

2011-06-02T05:00:00.000-07:00

One of our all-time favourite Asian-Hijab wedding posts of all time, Sabrina's ceremony, mashaAllah. Jazzakallahkheir Sabrina for showing girls they don't have to take off their hijabs to wed in the style of their culture;). To see more of the pics visit her wordpress site http://www.sliceoflemon.com/

BTW, if you would like to help other sisters wear correctly for their wedding days or share your creative hijab style for this special occasion and wedding planning skills;) please email your pics to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding#10: G's Nikah

2011-06-02T03:09:00.001-07:00

I lost the other pics from this nikah somewhere in my computer's many photo files. When I stumble upon the rest I promise to upload them because I adored this simple Islamic ceremony. One of my all-time faves because of the good hijab of the bride, and just the elegance and simplicty.

If you would like to help other sisters plan their weddings and wear their hijabs modestly and beautifully, please send you wedding photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com.

Real Wedding #9: Zuhra and Ahmed's Afghan Nikah in Glendale, California

2011-06-02T03:00:00.000-07:00

MashaAllah beautiful photography. I love the Emerald green of Zuhra's dress.

If would like to help other sisters wear hijab and plan a beautiful wedding/walimah/nikah please send us your photos at bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #8: Turkish Bridal in Ontario, Canada

2011-06-01T13:46:00.000-07:00

If you would like to help other sister wear hijab and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #7: Traditional Palestinian Wedding

2011-06-01T13:26:00.000-07:00

A young couple in traditional bridal fare of their region of Palestine. MashAllah;)

If you want to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah then please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding#6: Sara & Ahmd's Walimah

2011-06-01T13:10:00.001-07:00

An Egyptian-American couple. I like the bridesmaid's dresses.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah then please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #5: The Scintilating Butterflies blogger

2011-06-01T12:45:00.000-07:00

I love the train of her gown. To find out more (like who designed it)...

And to see the rest of the fabulous pics please visit her blog: rnadiasabrina.blogspot.com and in July she promises to post the rest of the wedding photos, including reception, and nikah ceremony;)

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #4: Hana's Nikah

2011-06-01T12:03:00.000-07:00

Hana from Stylecovered.com wore a beautiful simple purple gown. I personally would love a white satin silk version of such a dress;). Not that I intend on having another wedding.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #3: Shareen's Nikah

2011-06-01T10:31:00.000-07:00

all pics taken from rnadiasabrina.blogspot.com [see her site for more photos and her maxi dress hijab style ;) ]. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE the bridesmaids dresses, mashaAllah. The girls all have such good hijab and look so pretty.

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #2: Nikah of Tanya Weeks

2011-06-01T10:26:00.000-07:00

MashaAllah I love sisters who have their nikahs in the masjid and wear white dresses;).

If you would like to help other sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Real Life Wedding #1: Ayesha's Nikah

2011-06-01T09:50:00.000-07:00

MashAllah. I love Ayesha's wedding pics, and her simple but lovely nikah.

If you would like to help sisters wear hijab for and plan their wedding/walimah/nikah please send your photos to bm_pixie@hotmail.com

The Sunnah for Dealing with Personal Insults Against the Name & Character of a Muslim/Muslimah

2011-06-01T04:44:00.001-07:00

If you write a blog, I have found, people are going to insult you. If you speak about following the sunnah, someone is going to hate you, or try to ridicule you for it. My question is, how does a Muslim react to defend themselves? Not their bodies, not their homes, but their name and reputations?

We all know we have to defend Islam itself, and thus the Prophet sallalahu alahi wa salaam, but our individual selves from insults?

The people of Taif insulted and threw rocks at Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.
But he did nothing and stayed patient.

Once, he was praying and some wicked people put faeces near him.
Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. stayed patient.
He even asked Allah to grant him more patience.

Throughout his lifetime, a blind old woman kept on using vulgarities on him.
Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. stayed patient.
He even FED that granny EVERY SINGLE DAY, until one time, he died
Abu Bakr R.A., the 1st caliph, came to feed that granny in his place.
That granny asked him [worded much more loosely than in the original Arabic of the hadith;) ]: "You're not the usual guy. Who are you? Tell me who was that usual guy actually?"
Abu Bakr R.A. replied: "He was Prophet Muhammad s.a.w." ……..
And that old woman converted into Islam in that instant!!

So that is how Rasoolulah dealt with personal insults.

So how do Muslims usually deal with insults to them personally?

Pretty badly sometimes. We get angry, we get disheartened, we even sink so low and insult back sometimes.

This is not the attitude of the true believer, the mumineen. If we have spoken the truth, we have nothing additionally to explain to them to defend ourseleves… truth (Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala) is our defense, and what we should do is react with and pray for patience.

Patience so that you do not lose hope for the person who is hurting you. Hate their wickedness, but do not hate them as a man or a woman, or Shaytaan has won, and made despise your kind as Shaytaan despises mankind [Allah protect us from him! Ameen].

Allah grant us patience, save us from despair, guide those astray with hate in their hearts for their sisters and brothers, and keep us from becoming like them, ameen.

My Personal Take on Wearing the Gamboo3a/Shambassa Pouf/Camel Hump Hair Clips

2011-05-30T11:19:00.001-07:00

I wrote this originally as a comment on Ange's post but I wasn't logged into ILOVEHISHMA. I tried wearing Gamboo3a and I wanna speak from my own experience of wearing it even where it is the norm, and from my Islamic research.

I don't think they are haram (in that I am not qualified to make that kind of fatwa) but could be, since rasoolulah cursed women who had camel humps on their heads. I have read the ahadith and find that I personally (while certainly not a Shiekh) believe they are makruh---strongly disliked and could be haraam. Some say the hadith says to the side of the head. I have read the original Arabic and am good with directions and it says on top of the head [as the majority of the Ulema agrees).... soooo... I mean I used to wear them before I started taking my hijab away from culture and style ect, and getting at its core before injecting my personal style back into it, but I live in the Gulf and have interviewed men, both good and bad muslims about the clips. None actually like the shambasa/Gamboo3a itself, as it contorts the head, but all of them mentioned that they found or thought of the girls who wore them as being somewhat, er, sexier or easier, or less Islamic in general. Which I mean, is bogus, but in Islam we aren't supposed to purposely appear contrary to Islam or do anything that associates us with something haraam ect. I mean, we don't sit and eat with those who are drinking alcohol in Islam, because then we are associated with the sin of doing so. If committing taburruj (attracting attention [and Gulf men have told me they attract their attention regardless whether or not they find the clip itself attractive]) is haram, then associating one's self with an act largely regarded as tabarruj even by the majority of the male population (from my non Muslim father from the West to Gulf guys of all walks of Islamic adherence), is a similar act to sit drinking soda with a bunch of people sucking back booze. *I know I could say, if I don't wear it in UAE I'll be the odd one out and that will attract attention to, but same goes for wearing abaya/jilbab in the West. I have to remind myself, did I convert to Islam, or a culture?*

I stopped wearing them now alhamdulilah, and wish I had resisted that trend when I was in Emirates, but peer pressure you could say lol, got to me, and I tried it. Whether you wear it cone on top, or above the earline to the back, both have a "hump" effect that is purposeful. If your hair is just like that it isn't on purpose ect, but the intention of getting a hump was not favourable to Rasoolulah so it isn't to me;). I mean, I see so many women who suit that hadith, saying they have hump like camels and they are dressed but naked. i.e their abaya is flung open to revealing clothes or skin tight in the first place and the camel hump hijab is there, and this hijab style leads others astray because it is close to jilbab and khimar, but it isn't, and takes people farther away from the true hijab of the sunnah very easily if you are not careful. Do any hadith talk about women from the Sahaba (who even had long hair) having bumps of any kind on their heads?. I mean, abayaat have to be loose, the hijab has to cover the chest and all the hair (and you need a super long hijab to accomplish that WITH Gamboo3a) believe me. I never see girls do it right without gashwa or something over their gamboo3a. Everyone says the intention is good, but why then do I see so few examples of modest makeup, modest loose fitting abaya, and khimar that covers all the neck, chest, hair and body when worn with this style? I know some sisters do it well but they are THE VERY SMALL MINORITY (I have seen only 2 sisters in real life out of thousands wearing Gamboo3a), but the origin of the style was not Islamic or even having hijab in mind, and that is why I personally reject it and urge other sisters to do so as well. I don't want to associate myself with something that did not actually have a good intention at the core of its initial influence.

Anyways, that's just my take on it. My reasons. I am probably going to get sistas calling me extreme and what not but then, I don't care. I wish I hadn't worn the Gamboo3a ever, and so I am just sharing that in case it is useful to ya'll in anyway:)

2011-05-26T22:08:00.000-07:00

Asalaam alaykom ramatullahi wa barakto dear sisters,

This is just a post to highlight my personal and Islamic goals for this year. I usually make this list during Ramadaan, but fasting and studying Qu'ran along with all that cooking and visiting and tarweeah is hard enough during the holy month so I thought I'd get on it early. I want to give a special thanks to sister Um Aaminah [ anaashad.blogspot.com ] for her post "It's Okay I'm a Convert" which really spurred me on THIS month. Jazzakallkheir sis. And sis Zaenab from Stylish Muslimah for her vid of the minor signs of the day of judgement. LOL, sometimes I need that scare-factor to get my butt a-moving along. I am one of those people that start projects and doesn't finish them sooooo these were good reminders for me personally. Jazzakallahkheir girls!

1.) I know I am going to have a baby this year, and am going to be tired and what not, but my goal is to keep my house alot cleaner. I know this doesn't sound like an Islamic goal but really it is. I am trying to do alot more sunnahs in my day, and this one is one of them: basic cleanliness. I think it is difficult for me now because I have too much stuff. I am serrious. I manage to keep my husbands' stuff neat and tidy without struggle because he has four ghutrahs, 3 hats, 3 pairs of sandals, 1 pair of runners, 2 pairs of socks, 5 undergarment sets, and 4 thobes. Along with 3 pieces of excersise equipment and a small box of camping gear and tools we store outside. Whereas moi has a dozen house dresses, a bunch of Western clothes I almost never wear anymore because I don't have a place to, a dozen abayas (some I don't wear), 2 dozen shaylas (which I don't wear regularily, 5 niqabs (only 3 I wear regularily), party dresses which I wear not as often (maybe I can rent them out as they are expensive and I've rented other girls' dresses before?), and that's not even getting on all my books, and perfumes, and furnitures and knicknacks. Husband is content with alot less. A carpet and cushions and some mats to place food on for the living room. A bed and clean sheets and pillows for the room and a small sitting area with 2 mirrors, one for us both, ect. If I downsize things, it should be easier to clean. Ughhh, I am BAD at downsizing, but then I fondly remember my bachelor apartment and how neat and tidy that always was. InshaAllah carrying less pocessions is the cure. I am avoiding getting a maid at all costs. [This something nobody cares about except those who live in my house;) ]

2.) Pray all my sunnah prayers. This is something inner. I am trying but I struggle sometimes when I am in a rush and I travel alot.

3.) Pay off an old before I started practicing Islam serriously debt that has interest attached to it. Then I can start saving for hajj and finally go. I live so close, but there's no blessing really if I still have a sin attached me that requires dealing with. This is something inner because nobody knows about it but me [and now ya'll ;) so remind me if I sound like I am about to go off on a wild shopping spree for more furniture and clothes which I don't really need beyond some plain black cheaper abayas for hiking with husband--and he'll probably buy me those if I ask].

4.) After debt is paid, give more sadaqah. There's alot of fam's I know who can't afford meat, and alot of sisters who need things I already have, so before I buy more when I am not in need, I should check if there is someone out there who could use a few basics (and a nice thing once in a while). I have been poooooor before so I know it isn't nice to get something you'd never get for yourself. This is another inner thing, tied to #1.

5.) Understand my cats are just animals. I love them so much, but I think of them like children. I mean, when they pee on cushions because I forgot to leave the courtyard door open I get so mad at them, and they probably don't understand the yelling or me rubbing their faces close to the scent of their mess. And they can't defend themselves by going "Mama, your fault. We couldn't get outside and we tried and we asked you to open the door by meowing and you didn't hear us."

6.) Control my anger. I don't get angry very often, and I forgive very easily, but when I am angry I don't care to put myself in the other person's shoes. Bad, bad habit. I am getting better husband says. My inspiration is the baby. I don't want to raise it the way I was raised (no offense my parents, you did the best you could with eachother for mates and YOUR parents as examples). I mean, I don't want to call my child "stupid!" when he/she makes a small mistake, then it reinforces in them a kind of insecurity that has taken me years as an adult to overcome, plus a fear of intimacy.

7.) Stop listening to music. I have been good at this one since the pregnancy. Also, stop watching movies or TV that is questionable. I have thought of making my own edited DVDS lol, on a computer program. It is easier for than husband though, because there are more men on TV covering their awrah than there are women;). Please don't think I am extreme for this dear readers. It is a personal thing to do with my own conclusions over ahadith and Qu'ran;)

8.) Last year I stopped wearing the Gamboo3a (I had always thought it was makrooh) and more than neautral makeup and was careful to not wear abayas with alot of crystal. This year I am going to get 2 Islamiyia style ones made (I love them with dresses and skirts worn underneath, and a 1 abaya ras with sleeves. That is all my outer appearence needs cuz I already have more abayas than I need. And I guess new sandals because I murder sandals. 3 months, and then a decent quality sandal dies another death. This is an outer one because alot of Muslims notice this and think a sis is more pious cuz she wears niqab and abaya ras. Believe me, in my, it doesn't make a difference, but I am trying to live more simply and I don't have any non-Muslims to worry about being scared of me sooo....

9.) Try to bring Muslims that I know together more. When the ummah gets distant, divisions arise.

10.) Say bismillah for everything I am supposed to, alhamdulilah for everything I am supposed to, duas for the bathroom, and entering the home, going to sleep, waking up, and getting dressed. I've never concentrated serriously on this aspect of my daily life before.

Usually I make goals to study and learn more Qu'ran every year but suck at that. I have found what works best for me is settings aside 2-3 hours every friday to study and memorize some new ayahs and then using them all week. And I read English translations of the Qu'ran, 1 0r 2 surahs before bed. Better than just saying, I will do it in a big bold way.

One of the Sheikhs I know got his students to do this excersise in a lesson of Allah's mercy, keeping their results secret, where we were to list on our own, all our sins and our good deeds that we could think of easily from childhood to adulthood, and then rate them on a scale of 1-10 for how good or bad they were. Then we were supposed to tally our results, and then get rid of what we'd used to get our totals. Examining our totals, and keeping in mind Allah weighs all our good with our bad, none of use were satisfied with the good we had done in our lives up to this point. Every Muslims relies heavily on the mercy of Allah, and He is the Most Merciful, but the reason we'd had this excersise was to remind ourselves that there is always a reason to do more sunnah, to do more nafl acts, and concluded that even Rasoolulah prayed for forgiveness for himself, and that Allah would spare from punishment in the grave. When asked why he did this, when already promised Paradise, his answer was simple. "If I have been granted this, shouldn't I be even more thankful?" So those of us that haven't been granted such glad tidings.... Yep. Got me going on all the things I need to do. I liked the lesson because it was less aimed on what bad we had done, and more on, we have today, so what good can we do today? I mean, if the day of the lesson was the last one I had left on this earth, how many good deeds and extra acts of worship could I go out and do to try and tip the scales?

So those of you can't travel to Oman to have such Islamic classes (I wasn't enrolled in the class, I get the oppurtunity to be a guest occasionally thanks to friends who are absolutely insistant I finish my history degree and then get a masters in something Islamic or useful to the Ummah based) please have the benefit of this lovely lesson. And thank you to the Professer/Sheikh who really had us all smiling and working together to make our community better for that day:) no matter our different walks in life and stages of development in our Islamic studies.

The Islamic Heritage of Where I Live

2011-05-26T10:10:00.000-07:00

Pictured above (our family home, a 500-400 year old stone and mud structure [we also have more modern homes;) in other places of Oman]). The area of Oman where I live now is populated mainly by Arab tribes (Azdis) who migrated from Yemen when the Ma'rib dam collapsed in the first century A.D. Many of these tribes who came brought with them their knowledge of building with stone and mud (and sarooj---mud burnt with palm fibres and stronger than modern cement), sword fighting skills sharpened against the Persians and Roman Christians who had sought to conquer them in Yemen, and their Jewish religion.Mazen bin Ghaddouba Al Tai Al Sama'ili (from Sumail) was the first Omani to embrace Islam. Hearing of it, he was the first to travel to Medina where he said to the Prophet Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam "Oh you descendent of the blessed and nobles, Allah has guided the people of Oman to the right path of your religion." Returning to Oman, Mazen bin Ghaddouba built the first Mosque in the country, and though it has been renovated into a modern facility, it still stands to this day, pictured below: Shortly after the Prophet Mohamed, sallalahu alahi wa salaam, sent a letter to the Kings of Oman, brothers Jaiffar & Abd, sons of Julanda, inviting them to Islam. The family of my co-wife in our village was entrusted to keeping the letter, and before them another family, but have long since donated it to a museum [so I've only seen the copy :( ]. They have also donated one of their 400 year old stone&mud homes as a heritage museum of daily life in Oman and there this copy of the letter is kept:The Kings of Julanda accepted, and to a place afterwards renamed "Izki" from the word "zakat" was Amir Ibn Alas sent to distribute the zakat paid by Omani Muslims, to the needy and poor in Oman, rather than to the Captial of Islam, in Madinah. Omanis rapidly embraced Islam, including my co-wife's previously Jewish tribe. Below is a picture of ruins from around that time period (but modernly maintained up until 1970) in Old Izki:One of the things I personally love about where I live is the Prophet Mohamed's, sallalahu alahi wa salaam, blessing on it. When it was witnessed how Omanis accepted Islam, he, sallalahu alahi wa salaam said: "My religion is Islam, and the people of Oman will be granted more fertility and game. Blessedness is guaranteed for those who believe in me and saw me, and to those who believe in me without having seen me. Allah will strengthen Islam in the hearts of the Omanis."

The Omanis made several famous delegations to Medinah proclaiming their allegience to the central Islamic government in Madinah under the authority of Rasoolulah. After two particularily large delelgations led by peoples from Al Ghubaria (Oman) Rasoolulah said: "God bless the people of Oman, for they believed in me without seeing me." Upon Rasoolulah's death Amir Ibn Alas returned to Medinah with some zakat and a delegation of Omanis to give to Caliph Abu Bakr R.A.., upon which Abu Bakr said: "Oh people of Oman, you willingly embraced Islam. You obeyed him and caused no division or strife, so God has strengthed you for the purpose of good. Then when Ibn Alas was dispatched to you without army or armour, you responded despite being remote, and abided despite your great number; there is no favour better than your favours, no more honest actions than yours, and what the Prophet has said about you is honor enough until the Judgement day. Then Amir Ibn Alas resided in your land in a dignified manner and left it safely.... You had been good until the day the news came of the Prophet's death, when you proved yourself even more praiseworthy. I give council, and I share my spirit and my money with you, in order to make you, by the will of Allah, wise in what you say and guide your hearts and minds to the path of righteousness... I am not worried that you will be beaten in your land, or that you might renounce your religion. Allah bless you."

I know it isn't necessarily so in other parts of Oman, but in our village, everyone and I mean everyone prays all their sunnah prayers. Music isn't blasted out of cars on street corners (stores only play nasheeds as they know families don't like music), houses are very simple (that IS changing as people forget about showing off and giving ect and not being content with a decent salary), and hijab is very good. No one wears Gamboo3a pouf hair clips, the only makeup I see is kohl, women wear loose clothes, men wear loose clothes, and both have something on their head. No hair is seen on hijabs, and most cover their chests, mixing isn't done but people aren't extreme about it. Men and women study together at University and women work in almost all professions. Neighbors visit eachother. I actually don't hear alot of gossip or backbiting. Families are close. It isn't perfect, but it is as close as I have found anywhere. And while the black abaya has replaced the long colourful cotton lesos fringed with yarn which were worn draping over the inner garment (long mid-shin tunic and loose pants that are tight at the ankle and headscarf) as jilbab, Oman was closed from much of the world until the 70s and until then kept from modernization, so for historians many customs remain as they have been for thousands of years, including modes of dress, farming, building, and cooking. For me, it has made studying the historic Islamic clothing of Omani women very easy;). Just felt like describing where I'm at lol, and where my Canadian self is trying to fit in.

Medical Question #2: the hadith about a fly in your food

2011-05-26T06:12:00.000-07:00

I had posted a while ago, that alhamdulilah, I had the oppurtunity to pose a few questions to what is considered to be the Islamic World's (and totally world respected in the feild of medicine also, which is quite an accomplishment, mashaAllah) leading authority on medicine and Islam. Alhamdulilah, he happens to be a friend of my old boss (I just recently took time off from working due to my pereptual morning sickness). Hijab is a subject I am pretty knowledgeable on I am told;), enough to engage most of the Sheikhs and Imams that I have been introduced to, but medicine is something I am I am generally pretty clueless on. MashaAllah and alhamdulilah for this man's knowledge of both the science of medecine and Islam.

I am particularily thankful, because this question was my own, and it was something that was bothering me about my faith. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I was doubting Allah subhanahu wa t'ala or anything, but there was a hadith I found particularily weird. So weird in fact, I was hesitent to believe it was even sahih. Which was my first question to the Sheikh. I didn't want to be like some Muslims who pick and choose what they want of Islam by going "oh, I don't believe that hadith was authentic."

My question: Aslaam alaykom brother. Can you tell me if the hadith "The Prophet Mohamed, peace and blessings be upon him, said, 'If a fly falls into one of your containers [of food or drink] immearse it completely before removing it, for under one of its wings is a disease, and other the other, a cure.'" [Sahih Al Bukhari-Narrated by Abu Hurayra and Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri] is Sahih, and if there is any medical evidence to corroborate this?"

His answer, was, of course it was indeed Sahih/authentic.

Duh, I did kind of suspect that, knowing it was IN Sahih Al Bukhari, but something as weird as actually dipping the fly into your food before taking it out was just too weird for me to understand without science. I mean flies hang around poop and rotten meat so why would you ever want to keep them in your food any longer than them grazing it?

See, sometimes, I have difficulty accepting the beauty of Islam, when something is strange or difficult, until Allah subhanahu wa t'ala makes known the beauty of it to me. This is often my failing as a Muslimah I guess.

And YES, there IS scientific evidence to back this hadith up. Amazing, subhanAllah, that all this has just been discovered recently, but Rasoolulah had told us all about it 1400 years ago (ya know, before microscopes). It was only in the last hundred years that people outside of Islam knew that flies actually carried diseases, and it wasn't until medical student Joanne Clarke and her colleagues at the Depatment of Biological Sciences at Macquarie University began to ponder about the flies' amazing immunity, that proof of the flies' use as an antidote was confirmed to Western science in the production of new antibiotics.

Apparently, while the fly does carry parasitic pathogens that can cause diseases such as malaria, cholera, and typhoid, it also carries parasitic bacteriophagic fungi capable of fighting the germs of all these diseases. So it is, indeed, the disease, and the cure. SubhanAllah.

The scientists apparently tested a bunch of species of flies when they were in their larvae stage, and adult stage. Most species had antibiotic properties even as larvae AND ALL did, as adult flies. These properties existed on the surface of the flie. The researches managed to extract the antibiotic from the flies by immearsing them in liquid. Then the antibiotic was tested on harmful disease pathogens E. Coli, and Staph infection. It was successful in combating these diseases.

Neat, no?

Just for Fun

2011-05-25T03:18:00.001-07:00

What would you be? (from Um Hamza's blog)

If I were a month, I'd be December
If I were a day of the week, I'd be Wednesday
If I were a time of day, I'd be Fajr
If I were a planet, I'd be Venus
If I were an animal, I'd be a dolphin
If I were a direction, I'd be the North
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be a daybed
If I were a liquid, I'd be a vanilla milkshake…or hot qahwa
If I were a gemstone, I'd be an Emerald
If I were a tree, I'd be a palm tree
If I were a tool, I'd be a paintbrush
If I were a flower, I'd be a tiger lilly
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be a misty warm rain
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be an Irish flute
If I were a color, I'd be emerald green
If I were an emotion, I'd be impatience
If I were a fruit, I'd be a mandarin orange
If I were a sound, I'd be horses at a race
If I were an element, I'd be oxygen
If I were a car, I'd be a Mustang Convertable
If I were a food, I'd be blackened creole chicken with sauted mushrooms
If I were a place, I'd be Venice
If I were a taste, I'd be cloves and cinnamon
If I were a scent, I'd smell like rain on apple blossoms
If I were an item of clothing, I'd be a gown
If I were a body part, I'd be a heart
If I were a facial expression, I'd be "rolls eyes"
If I were a song, I'd be "an Irish reel"
If I were a pair of shoes, I'd be kitten heels
What would you be?

Maternity Must for Muslimahs, a hadith about what you should eat from Rasoolulah

2011-05-25T02:16:00.001-07:00

"Whenever you eat fruit, eat melon, because it is the fruit of Paradise and contains a 1000 blessings and a 1000 mercies. The eating of it cures every disease."

The Arabic word for Watermelon as mentioned in the Hadith is 'Batikh' or 'Bittik'. Anyone who has ever researched food in Islam will know:

1.) Among the fruits that the Prophet(sallallahu aliyhi wassallam) liked were grapes and watermelons. (Abu Dawood)

2.) I saw the Prophet(sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) of Allah eating watermelon with dates. ( Narrated Anas bin Malik(radhi yallah anhu) - Tirmizi)

3.) Prophet Muhammad(sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) liked grapes and watermelon. ( Abu Dawood)

4.)Prophet Muhammad(sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) used to eat watermelon with fresh dates. (narrated Ayesha(radhiyallahu anha) - Tirmizi)
5.) The Messenger(sallallahu alaiyhi wassallam) of Allah said, 'Eating watermelon before meals washes the stomach and removes its diseases (Ibn Asakir)
But Rasoolulah made a special recommendation for pregnant woman to eat "bateeq" i.e watermelon: "None of your women who are pregnant and eat of watermelon will fail to produce offspring who are good in countenance and good in character."

And what Muslimah wouldn't want that?

If you're pregnant, the benefits are even more delicious. Watermelon eases heartburn and reduces swelling; its high water content (92 percent) and fruit sugars alleviate morning sickness and dehydration; and the minerals it contains can help prevent third-trimester muscle cramps. Ounce for ounce, watermelon is richer than tomatoes in lycopene, an antioxidant that protects against cancer and cardiovascular disease, boosts the body's immunity to infections and naturally raises the skin's SPF, according to Steven Pratt, M.D., author of SuperFoods Rx (HarperCollins, 2003).

Even better news for pregnant women: A 2003 study in the International Journal of Gynecology and Obstetrics found that daily lycopene supplements reduced the incidence of preeclampsia by 50 percent. Test subjects were given 4 milligrams of lycopene; a single serving of watermelon can have triple that amount. What's more, scientists have discovered that watermelon is packed with vitamins A, C and B6, as well as potassium and magnesium. These nutrients are important for the development of your baby's vision, brain, nervous and immune systems, and more. For you, potassium regulates water balance in the blood and body tissues during pregnancy. And you get all these benefits for less than 50 calories per cup.

An Easy Way To Ease Nausea
Some pregnant women swear that watermelon is all they can keep down when morning sickness kicks in. Perhaps the only thing more refreshing than a big slice is a glass of fresh watermelon juice or a watermelon ice pop--and making either is so easy.

To make juice, purée 8 cups cubed seedless watermelon in a blender until smooth. Pour through a fine-mesh sieve (don't press the fruit through with a spoon, or the juice will be too fibrous). Discard the pulp. Serve the juice immediately or chill it, stirring well before serving. If desired, add 1 tablespoon citrus juice (such as lime, lemon or orange) to intensify the flavor. Makes 1 quart, or about 4 8-ounce cups.

To make ice pops, purée 4 cups frozen, seedless, cubed watermelon and 1 tablespoon lemon juice in a blender. Pour purée into popsicle molds or 10 small paper cups. To forgo the fibers, strain purée through a fine-mesh sieve before pouring into molds. Top each cup with aluminum foil, making a small slice in the top of each with a knife and inserting a wooden stick. Place in freezer until hardened, then unmold when ready to eat. For variety, mix the purée with lemonade, sweetened low-fat yogurt, fruit juice or other fruit purées before freezing.
Makes 10 2 1/2 -ounce servings.

So if you are in a pregnant state like me, enjoy your reason to indulge in this delicious treat;)

Runway Inspiration: Resort 2012 Yellow

2011-05-25T01:12:00.000-07:00

I loved 2 things about Chanel Resort 2012's collection, 1. the use of the colour yellow, and the very modest make-up. This how I'd do it, with a long yellow cotton suit coat, yellow chiffon maxi dress, white purse and shoes, with a cream hijab.

Forums and Youtube, and comments trashing Islam

2011-05-24T18:51:00.000-07:00

I just want to write a quick post.

Background. I have a youtube channel that is pretty much defunct that I never use and was thus totally backed up with old comments. Half of them were from people trying to insult me for being Muslim, telling me I am stupid, and the same old same old garbage about slaves, hijab, and the Prophet and Aisha's marriage. I, of course, owe it to them, in the hope that Allah will guide them, to answer and each and every one of their accusations with an accurate truth, polite and patient, as paintstaking (and probably useless) as that task is. Afterall, I put a video up aimed at Muslims mainly, or answering such people, so I did, I guess, put myself out there for them to argue with to begin with.

I could rant and rave forever about how no matter what I say, even if it is logical, even if it tears their accusations to shreds, I will be dismissed as stupid (no matter how educated I am on their religion or beliefs and my own), a traitor to womenkind (no matter how happy and healthy my life is and how free I am in compare to before Islam), a leech on Western society (even if I worked, paid taxes, and worked charity for non-Muslim less fortunates, go figure), or... I must brainwashed (by who I wonder?---it could only be myself since no one else asked me to become Muslim and I had to seek Muslims out). But there is no point. It is Allah's will, as He, subhanhu wa ta'ala says it in the Qu'ran: "There is a seal upon their heart. They are deaf, dumb and blind." So that is not my point in this post.

What I will say is this. Most of these people claim to love Jesus. But I know a true Christian from these people easily. A true Christian walks the walk, and when you ask, talks the talk. All these people do is spend their time messaging Muslims about how stupid and wrong they are, and favouriting videos about stonings in Afghanistan. They talk the talk, and even offer to pray for me to come back to Jesus (as if I left his true teachings, which are laid out clear in the Bible "I am a son of Adam (i.e a man, not God" even if you aren't a Muslim and you take Jesus's word over other people speaking for him in either parts of the book). Anyways.... I just wonder at all this effort they make trying disprove Islam or make a believer sad or *leave* Islam, when they see a video about how a Muslim is just trying to live their life, and talk about their beliefs.

I mean, myself, my videos are about how Islam is in my life, how I believe in it, what I know about it. I don't go searching the net for "Christians or Atheists or what not" are bad or anything, and then writing them messages that they are stupid and my Islam kicks their religon's butt ect.

But....

I click on the link of the Islam-hater who comments and on their channel, why don't I see a video of them talking about their beliefs, explaining their beliefs, living their beliefs? Why don't I see videos explaining how Jesus lived his life favourited, how Christians are supposed to be? What I see is videos about random things (even things contrary to a good Christian life) and the occasional "Mohamed the rapist" and "stoning in Iran" video thrown in. Nothing about God, nothing about Jesus. And they want to pray for me and tell me their way is better than mine by insults, not proof.

I want to laugh at them but honestly, I feel so sorry for them, really. Imagine if they turned their passion for hating and insulting into passion for seeking knowledge? And I mean, real knowledge, real opinion, not just repeating the same thing someone else said without undertanding it and where it came from.

I dont mean this on the blog so much, but in youtube.

Anyways, that is pretty much this random lost in thought post.

Allah guide the disbelievers as it is Your will, and fortify the Muslims in patience and fortitude, and increase our knowledge, ameen.

Sunnah In the Manner of Eating & Drinking

2011-05-24T15:31:00.001-07:00

When I converted I learnt about halal and haram slaughtered meats (and even candies), to eat with my right hand, and to say "bismillah" before eating and "alhamdulilah" after. Recently I have been doing research into the diet of the Prophet Mohamed salalahu alahi wa salaam, and discovered that some acts of the sunnah are fading away, even in Muslim countries like the one I live in. So I compiled a list of my research findings and just thought I'd share it with ya'll. Sorry if it isn't terribly interesting but some of it I never knew;)

Sunnah in the manner of eating:

WASH YOUR HANDS BEFORE A MEAL

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "The blessings in the meal is by washing before and after it." (Hadith- Abu Dawud)

WHEN A MEAL IS SERVED AS THE PRAYER IS CALLED, TAKE THE MEAL FIRST

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "If the Iqama for prayer is proclaimed and supper is served, take your supper first." [Hadith-Sahih Al Bukhari 7.374, Narrated Aisha]

INVOKE THE NAME OF ALLAH for BLESSING IN FOOD

The Apostle of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, then said:
"When one of you eats food, he should say: O Allah, bless us in it, and give us food (or nourishment) better than it." [Hadith-Abu Dawud, Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas]

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "When one of you eats, and he forgets to mention the name of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala then let him say, 'Bismillahi Awwalahu wa Aakhirahu.' (Narrated in Ashraf al-Wasail ila-fahm al-Shamail, p269).

DO NOT EAT OFF OF OR SERVE FOOD FROM SILK OR OR GOLD CUPS, PLATES OR UTENSILS

When a Magian served Hudhaifa water, Hudhaifa refused the cup, and said he would not have done so but he heard the Prophet Mohamed, peace and blessings be upon him, say "Do not wear silk or Dibaja, and do not eat or drink in silver or golden vessels, and do not eat in plates of such vessels, for such things are for the unbelievers in this worldly life, and for us in the hereafter." [Hadith- Sahih Al Bukhari 7.337, Narrated Abdur Rahman bin Abi Laila]

SIP AND DON'T GULP, AND DO NOT BREATHE INTO A DRINK OR SOUP

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) would drink in three draughts and would refrain from breathing into the glass, but would do so away from it Sayyidina Anas ibn Malik radiyallahu anhu relates that Rasoolullah sallallahu alaihe wasallam drank water in three breaths (i.e. in three gulps/sips) and used to say, "It is more pleasing and satisfying in this manner."

DON'T LEAN ON SOMETHING WHILE EATING

Allah's Apostle, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "I do not take my meals while leaning [against something]." [Hadith-Sahih Al Bukhari 7:310, Narrated Abu Juhaifa]

IF YOU ARE UNSURE OF WHAT A FOOD IS, ASK, and it is halal to refuse something one personally dislikes even if it is halal

He went with Allah's Apostle, peace and blessings be upon him, to the house of Maymoonah, who was with his and Ibn Abbas' aunt. He found with her a roasted mastigure which her sister Hufaida bint Al-Harith had brought from Najd. Maymoonah presented the mastigure before Allah's Apostle, peace and blessings be upon him, who rarely started eating any (unfamiliar) food before it was described for him. (But that time) Allah's Apostle, peace and blessings be upon him, stretched his hand towards the mastigure whereupon a lady from among those who were present, said, "You should inform Allah's Apostle of what you have presented to him. O Allah's Apostle! It is the meat of a miastigue." (On learning that) Allah's Apostle withdrew his hand from the meat of the mastigure. Khalid bin Al-Walid said, "O Allah's Apostle! Is this unlawful meat to eat?" Allah's Apostle replied, "No, but it is not found in the land of my people, so I do not like it." [Hadith-Sahih Al Bukhari 7.303, Narrated Khalid bin Al Walid]

RESPECT [halal] FOOD AS A GIFT FROM ALLAH, do not criticize it or complain about it

"The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) never ever complained regarding any food, if he liked it he ate it, if he did not he left it." [Hadith-Abu Dawood]

DO NOT EAT OR DRINK WITH YOUR LEFT HAND

Abdullah bin Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said "When one eats then he should eat with his right, and when one drinks then he should drink with his right hand." [Hadeeth- Al Bukhari & Muslim]

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "When of you eats let him eat with his right hand, for verily Satan eats and drinks with his left hand." [Hadeeth-Abu Dawud]

EAT WITH THREE FINGERS, THE INDEX, THE MIDDLE FINGER, & THE THUMB

Ka'b bin Malik (may Allah be pleased with him) reported: I saw the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, eating with three fingers (i.e, the thumb, the index finger, and the middle finger) and licking them after having finished the food. [Hadith-Muslim]

Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Whenever the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) ate food, he would lick his three fingers [Hadith-Muslim].

*If Rasoolulah ate with more than or less than three fingers why did he not lick all of them? A. He wouldn't have because he stressed the practice of licking the fingers for the blessing of the food.

EAT FOOD FROM THE OUTSIDE TO THE MIDDLE OF THE PLATE

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "When one of you eats let him not partake from the middle of the plate, rather take from around it, for the blessings descend from upon the middle of it." (Hadeeth- Abu Dawud )

DO NOT WASTE FOOD, & FOOD THAT FELL ON CLEAN DIRT IS NOT UNCLEAN

Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) commanded the licking of fingers and the gleaning of the dish, saying, "You do not know in which portion the blessing lies.'' [Hadeeth-Muslim].

Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said, "Satan appears at everything done by you; he appears even at one's dinner. When a morsel of any of you falls, he should pick it up and remove any dirt on it, and then eat it. He should not leave it for Satan, nor should he wipe his hand with the towel until he has licked his fingers, for he does not know in what portion of the food the blessing lies.'' [Hadeeth- Muslim]

The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings upon him, said: "Whoever eats in a plate let him (at the end) lick it, the plate will ask forgiveness for him." (Hadeeth- Ahmad)

DO NOT OVER EAT: do not eat until you feel full

Quran Al Kareem: "Eat and drink but not to excess " (7:32)

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "the believer eats to fill one intestine and the disbeliever eat to fill seven." [Hadeeth- Muslim]

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Eating too much is misfortune." (Shuab al-Iman of Bayhaqi)

On the authority of Al-Miqdaam ibn Maadiy-Karib who said: I heard the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) saying: "No human ever filled a vessel worse than the stomach. Sufficient for any son of Adam are some morsels to keep his back straight. But if it must be, then one third for his food, one third for his drink and one third for his breath." [Ahmad, At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasaa'I, Ibn Majah – Hadith sahih]

Umar ibn al-Khattaab (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "0 people, beware of overeating! For it will make you lazy in your salah (prayer), weaken your body and make you unhealthy. And indeed, Allah dislikes the obese person (ie obesity caused by eating too much, not medical reasons). Rather, be modest when it comes to eating, because it is closer to righteousness, far away from extravagance and it will make you stronger in worshipping Allah. Verily, you will perish when your desires become dearer to you than your religion." (lbn abi al-Dunya)

The Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Food for one is enough for two and food for two is enough for three and food for three is enough for four." [Ahmad, At-Tirmidhi, An-Nasaa'I, Ibn Majah – Hadith sahih]

BLESSINGS ARE FOR THOSE WHO SHARE THEIR FOOD WITH OTHERS

The Companions of the Messenger (peace and blessings be upon them) complained: 'O Messenger of Allah, we eat but are not satiated.' The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: 'Perhaps you eat separately?' They replied that they did. He said: 'Eat your food together and say Bismillah before you start, that will bring blessings into your food.'" (Hadeeth-Abu Dawud)

THANK ALLAH AFTER FINISHING A MEAL OR FOOD OR DRINK OF ANY KIND

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said: "Verily, Allah is pleased with His servant when he eats a morsal and praises hims, and when he takes a drink and then praises him (Al-Hamdulillah)." (Hadeeth- Abu Dawud)

AFTER EATING RINSE THE MOUTH WITH WATER, & one does not have to make wudu/ablution after the act of eating

We went out with Allah's Apostle (peace and blessings be upon him) to Khaibar, and when we reached As-Sahba', the Prophet asked for food, and he was offered nothing but Sawiq. We ate, and then Allah's Apostle stood up for the prayer. He rinsed his mouth with water, and we too, rinsed our mouths. Narrated Suwaid; We went out with Allah's Apostle to Khaibar, and when we reached As-Sahba', which (Yahya says) is one day's journey from Khaibar, the Prophet asked for food, and he was offered nothing but Sawiq which we chewed and ate. Then the Prophet asked for water and rinsed his mouth, and we too, rinsed our mouths along with him. He then led us in the Maghrib prayer without performing ablution again.

[Hadith-Sahih Al Bukhari 7.365, Narrated Suwaid bin An Numan]

Hijab in Oman pt. 1

2011-05-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

Hijab style really does vary depending where you live in Oman, though the differences are subtle beyond Beduoins and Southern Salalah/Dhofari style. Muscat, the Capital style, is anything worn underneath but usually Western clothes, with black abaya worn on top and either a colourful shayla, or a black shayla, styled in one of three ways if you are Omani. In other regions of Oman outside of Muscat, traditional dress is worn underneath the abayas or jalabiyias and sirwaal. Muscat doesn't have any colour rules when it comes to the headscarf so bright shaylas and rainbow pashminas abound. You can go blinged, you can go subtle in black, or totally crazy texture and colour. Also there is no law that says you must wear abaya or cover at all, but almost all Omani women do wear abaya. Some opt for skirt suits if they do not wear abaya, and younger girls who've just started wearing hijab, skinny jeans and then open abaya with skinnies, and then finally, the abaya not showing the shape of the legs anymore. The most common way of wearing the headscarf or shayla it is to wrap it all the way around starting with one end being slightly longer than the other from the middle section, but this does not cover the chest, with the decorative end pinned to the side to flap loosely. If one lacks pins they will tuck the loose end under the temple or the chin to make it hold and stay. *Most Omani women do cover their hair, though I noticed the tweens usually don't (they may also wear skinny jeans and sneakers on their way to transitioning to abaya). Also, no one wear undercaps, so if there is slippage, one just rearranges their shayla and it isn't a big haraam deal since it is usually unintentional.* If wearing this look, I tend to wear two shaylas, one underneath for chest coverage, and the other so that the decorative trimmings on the edge of the shayla hang nicely. Otherwise, I don't wrap my scarf an Omani way at all. Omani and Emirati shaylas are shorter than Saudi and Qatari styles. The second most common way is to style is with one end being longer than the other and leave this hanging down over the bust. But since it is not pinned there it tends to move and expose one boob, alas, unless you are pancake flat (mashaAllah, I actually envy this look as a woman who likes to run), or have a wider pashmina. Omani shaylas are never enough for anyone larger than a small B cup bra. I've thought about pinning a pashmina with a brooch to secure it so it doesn't move in this style, but I usually wear black shaylas.Another look that is popular with certain Muscat sets is the Gamboo3a worn under the hijab as in UAE. I have not seen anyone wear this look with chest coverage, and most of the time, because it makes the head bigger, it also lifts the shayla up at the back of the neck and may expose the neck and some hair at times. Unless worn with Gashwa or niqab it isn't very Islamic the way girls in Oman wear it. Gamboo3a is the flower pouf claw hair clip show above, modelled by some lovelies interested in experiencing an Omani makeover lol. *Note, in the interior, and outside of Muscat towards UAE, excepting places in Sharqiyah (the Eastern region) and Salalah (the Southern region) wearing the Gamboo3a is taken as a sign of being irreligious, and even of being "slutty" in Oman (unless you are Dhofari from Salalah, as this is part of their culutre).* Where I live it is a no-no. So is seeing the shape of your hair high on the head in the shape of a bun. So I tend to wear my hair in a low bun or braid it. If I wear a high bun because I am in a rush, I also wear a gashwa, so no one will think that I am a "bad girl" with a bump. Guys in Muscat not from Muscat (most people work in Muscat but are not originally from Muscat) will think you are easy or less religious if you wear Gamboo3a, even Salalah guys if you do not cover your face while wearing it, so do keep that in mind. The Gamboo3a is de rigeur for girls from Salalah, and it is worn higher on the head with niqab. Though I don't have pics, Salalah girls usually have the most glam abayaat, and they wear their regional niqab style, which is a shorter face veil with or without a nose string. There are no colourful shaylas, but abayaat may be intricately embroidered or covered with crystals. Alas, from all who I have spoken too, though some Dhofari girls adore their niqabs, others are forced, and it is worn for more a cultural reason than for an Islamic one. I have two Salalah niqabs, one with a string, and one without, and I do love them for ease of eating out, and style. Though I don't think people not from Salalah wear them in Oman. I don't care. No men who are not Dhofari will try to hit on you when you wear one, and any Dhofaris, as soon as they figure out you are a Westerner, will leave you alone :D. Underneath their abays, Dhofari girls usually wear cotton Abu Thails (a traditional garment that has a long train in the back and if just below the knee at the front). They will style their shayla with the decorative end flipped up over the front of the niqab (saudi shayla style) or with a gashwa from UAE attached at the back. I am usually lazy and just strap the niqab on over a longer shayla.Just outside of Muscat, in interior villages, or inside homes in Muscat where alot of male visitors will come and go, colourful dresses called "Lendli" are worn with a very modest long shawl called "Laysu". An even longer shawl may be worn over top the "laysu" as a jilbab, also or bright colourful fabric, and it is called a "warquayah". The lendli differentiates itself from most Jalabiyias, in that it is not overly decorated, maybe some simple embroideries or flounces of fabric on the cuffs of the sleeves and neckline and some crystals. But Omani Lendli are almost always composed of brightly printed fabrics in a wide array of colours. They are either made of cotton, or of chiffon lined with silk. They are not for formal occasions and are the most commonly worn garment in villages or when visiting in homes. Some still cover them with abayas, but close to home many wear them outside as a jilbab. Trousers are always worn underneath, and most girls favour leggings these days but the older ladies wear nylon ones lined with lace at the bottom. I love the laysu because they ALWAYS cover the chest. They can even cover to your waist if you want to wrap them that way.Traditionally, abaya was not the jilbab worn by Omani women. Beduoin wore black cotton mesh "Ghabah" which is a semi-sheer overgarment, and village women wore long warqiyah shawls, which were effectively colourful "chadors/khimars". The abaya first came to Oman with the event of the Gulf oil boom, where many Omani relocated to Bahrain for work in the oilfeilds. This was the abaya raas, the Gulf style overhead, which has to be held closed. Older Omani women tend to wear it with their intricate traditional dress styles on underneath, and Shia Omani sisters tend to wear is almost exclusively in Muscat sans veil, with their floral "lendli" outfit underneath. Maybe that's why when I first moved here the Shia girls were so quick to adopt me? Really, no one my age in Muscat wear overhead unless she is Shia. Alas, I was not. If I do not wear a flip niqab with my overhead, I am almost always assumed to be Shia. Also, because of the way I cover my chest. Most shia sisters in Oman have mashaAllah the best sense of chest coverage, and my husband totally admires them for this, and thier modesty when it comes to cosmetics. I rarely see Jafari girls with makeup on at all outside of their homes. Same goes for interior women in their lendlis, but in abayas, they usually fail on complete chest coverage. Women who wear the flip niqab or gashwa (usually imported from UAE, Qatar, or KSA) usually do so for religious reasons and have good coverage from their longer face veils, and they may pair it with abaya raas, or shoulder abayaat. I wear both, though unless I am in traditional Omani dress that is too fancy, I never wear my overhead without niqab. In Oman though, it is most commonly worn without.Shoulder abayaat in the average household price range for Oman come in more variety of designs than the rest of the Gulf. KSA and UAE can't compare, though when it comes to the very high priced designer styles, UAE has that. But honestly, I've always found more to my style in Oman. When it comes ofr niqabs though, one is stuck with tailors makes, and Al Motahajiba niqabs, unless you want Salalah styles, unless you are a better shopped than me maybe. Omani women wear casual styles, and more ornate designs, but tend to do so modestly for the majority, unlike UAE, where open styles are paired with too-tight or revealing clothes underneath. They do save the sheer styles though, for weddings that are women only events, alhamdulilah.

Abayas that work well with Coloured Shaylas

2011-05-12T01:03:00.000-07:00

I am in dire need of a new plain black abaya with minimal detail (doesn't need a shayla) that I can wear Lendli dress underneath with. My old abayas for this detail for Islamiyia style and of the perfect fabric but I have had them for five years now annd they had alot of holes. I want them not overly detailed because I intend to wear village-dress with them, and the "laysu" shawl styled as the hijab on top (less hot and best coverage than anything else I've ever found). I am thinking of having one tailored with Satin cuffs like the one above. Or another Jersey balloon sleeve one but I have about 4 of those already with printed stretch balloon sleeves already.

Omani girls don't really "style" the Lendli" but I am going to invent some new a pretty ways of wrapping it.

Polygyny Guide for Muslims from Pixie's Perspective: the good, the bad, and the ugly

2011-05-11T08:19:00.000-07:00

[LOL, the pic above is unfortunately how alot of Muslims (at least in my experience] veiw Polygyny: the practice of a man having more than one wife, in Islam, up to a total 4 women on the condition he treats them all fairly].

I'll start first with the ugly, which is, when men or women abuse the practice. Often men will disregard all the rules and sunnah (traditions exempled by the Prophet Mohamed salalahu alhi wa salaam, and his Sahaba) in either who or how they take a second wife. Or they do not treat one or more of the wives fairly. Also, women are guilty of behaving badly, and hurting what is halal in Islam. No wonder alot of women and men cringe at thought of being in my situation :(. Or that non muslims can make it the brunt of attacks on Islam.

In Islam, WHEN, and WHO can a man take as a second wife? Islam says that it is permissiable for a man to marry up to four women, but in the same verse that allows this, says this is done to support orphans. In Islam, an orphan is a woman without a maharam (male guardian, such as a father, Uncle, brother of age, or a husband). In the specific ayah pertaining to the allowance for this practice, it is termed in caring for women who have no husband or provider/family. So, Islamic orphans include those with no living family or living father or Uncle, Converts/reverts who have no Muslim relatives, widows whose Muslim husband has passed away, and divorced women. Many women in these categories are also single mothers. *ALSO* if a first wife, or the other wives are ill or unable to fulfill their wifely roles, it is ALSO permissable for a husband to take another wife, because he does deserve to have his requirements as a husband met. This can either be for reason of the wife/wives having dehaibilitating conditions, or inability to have children/bareness. The women the man marries must be Muslim or a practicing and chaste Christian or Jewish woman (practicing means they follow the book of their religion btw, and they are rare these days). The HOW of this is set on the condition that a man must be fair to all the women. This does not mean he cannot have feelings more for one than another* because the Prophet Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam had a preference for Aisha R.A over his other wives, but he must not let that preference be apparent in his treatment of all his wives. His spoken sentiments cannot be more for one than another, he must provide equally for financial and physical needs, and the time allotted must be the same for each wife.

The ugly: 1.) Some men completely neglect the fairness aspect concerning their wives. They spend all their money and time on one and completely neglect the other/others. This voids the validity of their marriage and women can divorce their husband over this, and he will have to answer to Allah on the Day of Judgement for this ill treatment. 2.) Some men marry a second wife only temporarily and then divorce her. This is haraam. This man is cursed. 3.) Some men marry another wife when there is nothing wrong with their first wife and look for a younger, prettier, and virginal second wife who is no way unable to find her own husband (as might be in the case of times of war) as a first wife or in dire need of physical and financial support. This is not being fair to the first wife, in the insecurities it might breed in her, and is not of the sunnah. The Prophet Mohamed salalahu alahi wa salaam was engaged to Aisha R.A before he married any other of his wives, and she was his only virginal wife, in fact, the only one who was not a widow or divorcee. All the wives that proceeded his engagement to Aisha R.A., were older than Aisha. His 2nd engagement after Aisha was to Sawda R.A who was widow senior to the Prophet salalahu alahi wa salaam, and was described as not being the colouring favoured at the time by the Arabs & slightly overweight by some of the companions. Obviously, concern should be for providing orphans with support and family, when taking multiple wives and the first wife has no condition upon her. 4.) Women behaving badly. When a wife tries to manipulate her husband from fullfilling his duties to his other wives. If she tries to steal time or money that should be more evenly distributed, questions him to reveal intimacies involving the other woman's lovemaking or private parts or to force him to give her gifts or sentiments not of equal value to something given to the other wife/wives, she risks making her marriage void before Allah, and will not be able blame her husband for this on the day of judgement. Also, speaking bad of the other wife to the husband, family or friends, revealing sins of the other wife/wives, refusing to say salaam or accept a visit or gift from the other wife, or trying to cause physical harm to her sister wife... ALL OF THESE things are not befitting a believing woman and may cause her to lose Allah's mercy for she will not be judged for her husband's actions, she will be judged for own towards another believer, and another sister in Islam.

Alhamdulilah, in my own situation, what keeps me from the ugly is A. my husband exhausts himself treating his wives (us) fairly. B. Neither of us he had married because one was younger or more attractive than the other. He married us firstly, because of the kind of Muslims we were. F, my sister wife, is the same age as me, give or take a year. She is GCC Arab and I am white revert/convert, and we have different looks, but neither of us is glaringly more attractive than the other. F also had kids to support and in her culture, divorcees almost always get looked down on. Had my husband more time (since it is difficult enough as it is dividing our days into equal 3 days Pixie, 3 days F [our ideal]) F knows an older divorced Omani girl our husband could marry to give her attention, and a home of her own, and children, since alot of women want children. If it were feasible, and affordable, both of us would support our husband to have another marriage if he married for an Islamic reason we'd also get reward for, such as sharing all the things that help a woman find happiness and strengthen her islam. Plus, it did not look like I could have children. F was very kind to me, and our husband informed us of his intention to marry again, and let us meet eachother before anything concrete to see if we'd like eachother ect. and could guage if the other woman could handle being in the same family.
C.) F & both see eachother as sisters in Islam. We do want for eachother what we want for ourselves. We are not always perfect, but we hold on to this ideal and try to measure ourselves by it.

Unto the bad. Even in the most halal of situations where everything was done the right way, not everything can work out perfectly.

Some men will never be able to treat all women fairly, or to marry for the right reason. These men should not marry more than one woman out of fear of Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala.

Some women will never be personally secure enough to be able to own their own identities in a marriage, even WITH their husband having only one wife. I was the only wife before. I had to get over my insecurities, to need Allah and know myself more than I needed a husband or attention and affection on the 24.7 to get to this. This can be a woman's beauty, but in a marriage with more than herself, it can be something that ravages her self-esteem. I personally believe that if a man is good and Islamic, all women could potentially be able to handle a marriage such as mine which is why it is halal, but I know from how many of us have been raised in our societies, insecurities and inability to define one's own identity run so deep, that the situation would be impossible to rectify in some cases. If you do not know your own value, know that what you have to offer no other woman can in the same way and glorify Allah by that, then my situation is probably not right for you, or will be very challenging. Women always say they couldn't because they are jealous, but jealousy is a small thing and is cured easily, but insecurities take alot more work. There is also nothing wrong with not being able to define one's identity so strongly, I am not saying that women who can accept these marriages are superior in any way at all. I am simply saying, despite what alot of men think, even the good ones, not all women are ready for it, or should have to accept it. Men should consider their wives abilities, and weigh them with their own needs/preferences. *If marrying again causes your wife to divorce you or be mentally unstable, probably you shouldn't marry, because she isn't at the state you can treat her fairly, even with her as a wife alone.

Additionally, society sucks, Muslim country or no. My own experience. F & I both have to deal with families that are nasty about the marriage (and I haven't even TOLD ALL MY FAMILY!). Some people simply refuse to visit F, and some friends stopped visiting me. I am afraid to tell people because we get the cold shoulder alot, and especially non Muslims here, they're kind to either F or me, but not both of us, and Husband is always regarded as pure evil. While F & I have come to terms with the gossip and people telling us to divorce Husband, we don't like it. Husband never cared, and says men are a lot nicer about it but are scared of their wives lol.

People (women) seem to think that the first wife either was not attractive enough for her husband or was sexually boring or bad somehow or that the second wife is a slutty manipulative man-stealer/ or a beauty who is everything first wife was not. Third wife USUALLY gets away with everything, so I think being third wife would be easiest lol! People are always trying to pity the first wife or hate the second, whether or not the wives accept the situation and are friends.

So I conclude, even if you live in a place where 2-4 wives is not that rare and certainly not against the law, society sucks. I think because Arab Muslim men have mistreated the institution for so long that it got a bad rap, even from the Muslims.

The Good: A.) You get all the benefits of being married with some perks of being single. You can make whatever you want to eat for dinner 3 days out of the week. Sometimes I make a plain can of soup, or just eat icecream and no one will ever care. I can go out with my girlfriends for as long as I want and husband is never like, I am bored, come home. I can choose whatever I want on TV or movies, and I can wear slobby sweat pants or a Granny jalalbiyia and not make the bed or do the dishes and not feel like a lazy or bad wife. How many married people can do that? Hmmm. Plus, the spark is always there when your man comes home. He missed you. Also, he thinks you are perfect, because you had 3 days to make the house clean, or do a home decorating project, or memorize a surah, master a new recipe, and make yourself as fabulous as possible. He has no idea unless one of your days ends up being s asick day or period day, that you aren't the best dressed or most interesting woman on earth. Or that you burn the new recipe on the first 3 tries. This really, really suits me. I love attention, I really do. But I think I get bored of it, and need a break from it, to really appreciate it, and be worthy of it. B.) Your sister wife is actually your friend and confidante. If you are mad at your husband and right, she's on your side and mad at him too, and he's more likely to change then if it was just you pointing out something that he's messing up. Two witnesses are always better than one. If you are wrong, she can make you laugh at yourself, and feel better anyway. Sometimes she likes to do the things that you hate to do with your husband and that he wants someone with him with. For example, our husband loves running and sports. F hates running. I like it. Husband and I run together. Husband likes volleyball. I hate it because I bruise very easily. F likes it. Works out so we both don't have to do stuff that we hate. And stuff husband hates like girly movies? Well, he still has to suffer through the same movie twice in a row if both F and I like it. It is nice for me having no Muslim family, to actually have a Muslim female relation. We can sit together and halal 2 girls and a guy hanging out situations, though be warned, in such situations, one woman is always playing the friend role, and the other the wife. I am okay with the friend role. I like my kind-of-gooshy moments in private. I am not a sentiments-in-public girl. I think a marriage works best if the husband marries 1 romantic type girl (F, definately lol), and another anti-romantic but into practical love kind of thing (me!), that way he can love both equally but in different things. That seems to be our marriage's strength, the three of us are realizing. C.) These kind of marriages help women who'd otherwise be alone find the phsyical protection and affection that they deserve. Otherwise they'd engage in haraam relationships to satisfy natural urges and longing for attention and affection, or be resigned to celibacy and maybe unable to support themselves, or marry men who would be less suitable or likeable to them. And in cases where the first wife is unable to fulfill her wifely duties, it makes it easier on the husband to fulfill his role as a husband, but have his requirements fairly met as well. This way, when done Islamically, and with love for all our sisters, no one is abandoned or allotted less.

I find it very helpful for women to read a book on women's issues by a Canadian woman called "Bent Rib" on the polygamy section of the book. Actually, I do recommend the book for all reverts or women living in the West as they explain many controversial Islamic issues, and "Women Around the Prophet" with a special look at the Prophet's wives, and his relationship with them. Also the men of the Sahaba's proposals to women, to understand polygyny in an Islamic manner. LOVE, LOVE these books.

InshaAllah you all found this rather opinionated post to be informative. I got alot of unpublished comments when I announced the news about my marriage lol, so I thought I'd gather the majority of my thoughts on the subject in one place.

Asalaam alaykom: Personal Update, About Multiple Wives In a Marriage, and BM Online Boutique

2011-05-05T14:29:00.000-07:00

Asalaam alaykom ramatullahi wa barakato sisters,

I hope you are all in the best of health and imaan. Alhamdulilah, I am into the third month of my pregnancy. The wacko baby hormones have made my skin perfectly clear and dewey, the morning sickness has shrunk my thighs (which no excercise or diet ever seemed to do---and I am not fat to begin with), and my bra size is starting to cause me back pain. I don't know anyone to ask but I hope they shrink back to normal size after the feeding period. [I always hated sisters blogging about icky baby and pregnancy stuff before so am sorry to bore ya'll with the same]. Bad thing is though, seems I am one of those people who will suffer the morning sickness past the three months period, which is rather wretched. The baby is growing though alhamdulilah, so despite my inability to eat a great deal of foods or be a normal person until well after 12:00 pm [I have thus taken time off from working because throwing up isn't very professional] I have a cute baby bump that is apparent though my abaya. I think, I will have to buy more clothes soon, since the abaya pulls at the front and gets tighter on the butt in the back. I will leave this to my husband, since he's the one who'll be picky about that.

Due to my sickness I have been slow to get the Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique fully running, and I apologize for that. I miss the morning shopping and that leaves only my evenings because shops in Oman close from 1-4pm everyday. And, since my husband shares days between me and my sister-wife, sometimes I elect to spend the night with him instead of the business, and HE HATES when I go to the souq without him (though the mall is okay) as many tailor shops have only men working in them. Please forgive me. My husband's holidays is soon, so I will have way more time, and will want to go to work in the evenings, since we'll spend the whole day together.

About the inqueries I have already recieved I am working on them.

Unto a marriage with more than one;) because I am sure you are all curious (or disgusted, who knows, but we're pretty happy).

The way our marriage works right now is my husband spends 4 days, then 3 days (because of the work week) on rotation with me and my sister wife. We'll call her F from now on. We usually rotate a Monday or a Sunday. She always gets the weekends, as this is easier for my husband, and I usually get weekdays (which was easier for me, because he could drive me to my work and back). But we switch this Monday between us every week so its fair. Also F and I can choose to give up days in order to book a day on the other's time. Also, maybe a day is special to us, like a wedding anniversary ect, or we have an emergancy, or a child's birthday if our husband isn't working. In that case, as they are special occasions, we usually have no qualms giving up our days. Our poor husband has to try and convince us to give up our time for his friends. We like to say we give him one day a month to hang out with his friends each, so that is two days, but this probably isn't enough for him alas. Which is why he says he doesn't have time for a 3rd wife even if we'd ask him to take one.

People always say they can't imagine their husband sleeping with or kissing another woman. Really, to be honest, it isn't a big deal to me or her. We have our special things each. He'll call her something that is meaningless to me, and he'll call me something that I like and makes me feel special. A man's honesty and attention are what a faithful husband is, and he is honest with us, and faithful to us. And if I have pleasure and closeness, I want her to have the same.

The hard thing is the occasional insecurity, feeling like the other wife is more of something or has something that you don't. This is where jealousy can come from. No woman is ever jealous in nature unless she is insecure in nature. Men should know this before they marry another wife. This is the key to where being fair to all comes in, besides in the material provision of wealth and time scheduling. If a man can manage his wives' insecurities honestly, the wives' feelings of having less or being less, there will be no jealousy.

A woman will feel like she is less or that the other wife has more if there is nothing special between her husband and herself. That "romance" quotient, the "wer'e meant for eachother" thing. People reading this will probably feel like that is a contradiction of being fair but we've learnt that it isn't.

Women have different needs, and different things are important to them. To me it is important that my husband thinks I am unique, that he admires my strength but is amused by my weaknesses, and that we share a good friendship and can just hang out for hours. F, she likes romance, to know that she is very feminine, that she is a better cook, to have someone to listen to her. I like to tell my husband stories. I think because F and I have different personalities, it is possible for my husband to love us each as if we are the only one (because we are the only one of our kind) and yet equally. He loves different things in us equally. The only hardship comes when both of us square off for the same love in the same thing. Like, lol, who is sexiest. This, I am sure, he is NEVER 100% honest with us. He'll tell one of us we are more experienced, and the other he'll tell, she's better at a certain thing. So he doesn't lie to either of us, but he isn't stuck in a corner. I think, as long as he gives us his full attention, and gives us equal time, then we feel desired enough that we forget about competing, and we can just be ourselves.

Me and F, we get along good now, though it took a bit of getting used to. I was kind of jealous cuz they both spoke Arabic and I suck at accented Arabic dialects lol but that was stupid, and F was kind of jealous because husband and me spoke a little Irish-Gaelic, and that she obviously didn't know, but neither thing in the end warranted anything and we got over it and laughed at ourselves.

Now, when we are too mad to listen to our husband, or are insecure about something and sad, we phone the other, and other cheers up, because they are usually in a more rational state than us. We both share what we know about Islam, health, and our husband's mood and character, to help the other improve her marriage. Really, it can be wonderful you know? Because if you complain about your husband to your friends, they never forget it, and he's always a creep even if you were wrong lol, and if you complain about him to your family they get involved and it become a mess (in my case, they think Muslim men are bad and Islam was a stupid choice for me). But is you complain about it him to your sister wife, she reassures you if you are right and takes your side and gets angry too, and if you are wrong, she helps you laugh at yourself, and how your husband can at times, be an idiot, even if he is right.

I always kind of wanted my life to be like this (only in the same house) we're a bit far away now due to realestate issues, but inshaAllah next year.

So, yeah, mostly doing good. Just the morning sickness thing getting me down. InshaAllah it ends soon and goes away and stays away:)

SUITCASE STYLINGS: Paris #2

2011-05-05T14:01:00.000-07:00

Caftan from Etsy.
This outfit is just about everything French to me. Blue stripes, lipstick red crocodile bag with matching shoes and cloves, a trench capelet, red necktie silk scarf, and beret. I would totally wear this shopping for groceries, touring the French countryside, or sitting at a cafe in the morning.

SUITCASE STYLINGS: Paris Outfit #1

2011-05-05T13:48:00.000-07:00

Pink tweed jilbab is from islamicboutique.com

I am making these sets for a friend who is planning a trip to Paris. I say, wrap a bow headband in your pink hijab. Pink tweed looks fabulous with black and white accessories, and tweed just wouldn't be styled in the frensh way, without a camelia-pin brooch.

Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique: Starting to Post "Tailoring Your Own Design" Options

2011-04-06T12:59:00.001-07:00

Alot of sisters have sent me inqueries about having coloured or custom designed abayaat/jilbabs tailored so I just want to let ILH readers know, I have just started to upload fabric selections and a basic price guide to different cuts and designs. In the guide I'll let you know what types of fabrics are available to make your design and the cost per meter of such (along with advice about which fabrics are best and which are simply a cheap option), how many meters of fabric your design requires, and any additional cost for embellishments like embroidery or crystals, ect.

And more information about designs like Grecian/DAS to come!http://beautifulmuslimahonlineboutique.blogspot.com/2011/04/abaya-cuts-for-tailoring-post-in.html

For Anna, what colours in Georgette I've managed to find so far (I also have pure silk, linen, and cotton) for coloured abayaat. For less quality ones, I can do poly-satin but I wouldn't recommend it for any place warmer for regular wear. http://beautifulmuslimahonlineboutique.blogspot.com/2011/04/fabrics-georgette.html

Come View "Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique"

2011-04-01T06:18:00.001-07:00

Come see the new site for online shopping: http://beautifulmuslimahonlineboutique.blogspot.com/

It isn't set up yet to take purchase orders but I can handle product and pricing inquiries and will be working over the next week or two to add inventory and selections so keep checking back.

I'd really like your feedback.

So if you have some time, check it out, and vote on the poll for how the merchandise should be displayed on the site. Right now I am just using the selections straight from suppliers so…. If you'd prefer I do something different than that, let me know. I am trying to arrange a fashion shoot and am just negotiating if it is less expensive to hire a model than it is to buy a mannequinJ

Jazzakallahkheir

And more on the sects sections coming up soon inshaAllah.

Pixie, Your Personal Shopper: Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique to Open Soon

2011-03-29T02:52:00.001-07:00

Bismillahi Al rahmani raheem.

Asalam alaykom ramatullahi wa barakto sisters,

BEAUTIFUL MUSLIMAH ONLINE BOUTIQUE OPENING SOON: As you all know, I announced a while back I was almost ready to start selling items from here in Oman, and eventually, other nearby GCC countries like UAE, Bahrain, and KSA. I posted a few items I would be able to stock for future sale, like niqabs.

But besides those items, I kind of had another idea.

The new "Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique" is not exactly going to be your traditional internet Islamic shopping experience. #1 difference is that for the time being, I am not going to stock a lot of merchandise. What I am going to do instead is treat every individual customer like they are my personal shopping client. That means, no matter where you live, USA, Canada, UK, Australia, and elsewhere, you will be able to shop like you are in the GCC, and more than that, like you are a VIP. All that is required for great style and this fabulous shopping experience is that you be able to take your own measurements according to my guidelines, and provide me with a secure way to ship the items to you, if my preferred methods are not available.

HOW IT WILL BE ORGANIZED: the boutique will be based online on blogger up until the point I feel it is necessary to create a website. It will be organized with your specifications tagged on the sidebar menu [design, cut, colour, designer, latest trends, new in stock, price categories, SALE, ect]. Once you click on the specific tag, it will take you to all available merchandise in your selection. You may also, of course, simply peruse the entire blog. If you find an item you want to place an order for, write down the order name of the item as listed, taking into account the shipping time listed on the description of the item. Some items will be in stock and in your size and may ship immediately. Others will require 2 days-1 week for tailoring depending on the supplier and this will be specified. Most items will be made to order, customized to your measurements for a perfect fit, and will take as little 2 days to 3 weeks to manufacture. I will specify where possible.

HOW TO PLACE AN ORDER: On the sidebar will be a link to the email address where I receive all orders. In the email you will have to state your measurements, the item order name/and or names, shipping address, and preferred method of payment.

CONCERNING PAYMENTS: I will be taking Western Union orders, wire payments and Drafts & Money Orders. I do require that I receive the entire payment before I place your order for tailoring or pick up from the supplier. So that means that depending on the time you require your item in, you may have to use a certain payment method, as I require all drafts/money orders to clear at the bank before I place an order for purchase and shipment. I will look into Visa, but don't really like encouraging riba/interest as it is a sin for Muslims. Prepaid visas seem okay to me so I will look into it.

Once I receive your email purchase inquiry I will immediately receive all order options for your item for you and correspond back to you if there are any additional options for you to decide on, such as fabric cost and quality, and the exact time of production for your item, as well as the full shipping cost, and any return policies.

QUALITY GUARANTEE: *Most stores that tailor the items won't allow for returns so I will personally guarantee the quality of your order before I hand over your hard-earned money. If they are later then they said they would be I will argue to get you a deserved discount*

Once you confirm your order and I receive your payment I will go to the stores for you, have your order placed, and I will pick your order up. I will be responsible to make sure that the quality you paid for is delivered, and I guarantee ;p I will be more reliable than ebay. I will then package the item according to its shipping requirements personally, and make sure it gets to you.

***I wouldn't sell you something I thought I was utter crap. Or even crap;D. I mean, unless I told you it was crap in writing, and that I wouldn't wear it or recommend buying it, but you still asked me to pick it up for you anyways. That's another story. Which will be highlighted shortly, under the heading WHAT WE DO NOT CARRY VIA THE BOUTIQUE WE CAN FIND.***

RETURNS: If you are not happy with your item in anyway at all and it was a returnable item, you will have to pay for the return shipping, but I will refund your money. If the fault of the item being not to your standard was my own [this is up to Beautiful Muslimah Online Boutique's own discretion] I will also reimburse the shipping also so please specify the cost of the shipping and the receipts for the shipping as well as our store receipt in your return.

STOCK: I will peruse monthly all of the abaya and shayla and hijab dealers in Muscat, Oman, from high end runway designers to individual tailor shops of quality who won't charge an arm and a leg for their services. I will let you, my clients, view the merchandise based on your specifications (colour, cut, design, designer, latest trends, prices, ect). Because I buy in larger quantities and have an established relationship already with merchandise providers, I am able to get discounts from some designers that you couldn't, even if you boarded a plane over here and walked into the store. For example, "Kitty Kat Bling" is an abaya worth her weight in genuine Austrian crystals designed by UAE's brand Hanayen and she costs approximately 200+ rials Omani. That is over $600 USD. I can buy her for 90 Omani rials (that's not a sale price from Hanayen btw, that is my preferred customer discount)--- $270 USD. Quite a discount, right? I am the QUEEEN of bartering!

I have made a deal with certain high end brands and some quality tailors to photograph their stock. I am working on uploading these items into their categories online. This process is kind of slow and ongoing so bear with me. I am starting with the more well-known brands and will move on to tailors soon inshaAllah.

Also, if there is an item you desire but that you do not find available through the boutique, then please read the next section.

WHAT WE DO NOT CARRY VIA THE BOUTIQUE, WE CAN FIND OR HAVE MADE: If there is an item you desire but you do not find available through the boutique send an email inquiry detailing the desired item to the site email with the subject being: INQUERY. If you have a picture of the item, even better. I can do my best to get a tailor to make you an old design, or to even tailor an abaya for you in a different fabric or colour. Want a silky bisht abaya in lilac purple or something? I can get the fabric cost and quote you for how many meters your design is going to require with fabric options +the tailor's fee. It can be done. You can also choose a cheaper embroidery or fabric then I would recommend for your abaya and shaylas and niqabs, and I can find you less quality items when available for those on a budget at your request. But if I tell you the item is not up to my standard, you are NOT allowed to complain about it to the hijab fashion blogging community later, right? Deal.

I will try to make a section quoting how many meters of fabric are required for some standard abaya designs that are popular, and three price selections for different qualities of coloured fabric, since bridal and special occasion abayas a lot of sisters would like custom-made. Like, for lace, how much, for silk, how much, for poly-sateen how much (though I'd save and splurge for the silk but you might be able to wear it wear you live).

***ONLY for abaya orders, I will hunt for a required accessory for you, on a personal basis, but don't intend to photograph accessories as listed stock in the meantime.***

PRICING: Final quoted prices will include shipping, the item cost, and my personal shopper fee/and or the profit I made from obtaining the item for you. For the most part, my fee will be in the quoted item price as it is listed in the available merchandise section. For tailoring orders, it will be specified per 1 item, and will be reduced + an item for additional items.

My personal fee is either a flat fee charge for my services in placing the order and its pickup and shipping, and/or for consulting for you a massive VIP shopper's discount, or a percentage fee in my manufacture of an item. I will never gauge you like some Islamic Online Boutiques. I know how hard it is to get good Islamic clothing THAT YOU LIKE in the West, and I want to eventually, inshaAllah, be able to cater to all income brackets.

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK OF THE IDEA SO FAR and if you have any interest in the abayas I posted above! They are a bit pricey though since they are designer and of really good fabric and workmanship, around $130.00 USD -$200 each.

The Technical Meaning of the Term "Khawarij" pt. 2

2011-03-29T02:43:00.001-07:00

Now, to study the technical definition of "Khawarij" from the perspective of some Shia scholars (who I will admit, I am generally less familiar with). Sheikh Muhammad Abduh [Nahju Al-Balagha Vol. 1, pg 78] attempts to explain the concept of what the Khawarij are more clearly than Sunni scholars by saying "the Mariqun [Khawarij] are those who have gone out of the religion, who have doubt and who are not sure, and he [Ali] crushed them with arguments and defeated them!"

To go out from the religion I personally would have to consider a Muslim to a. either commit extreme shirk of worshipping something other than Allah, b. to disregard the sunnah of the Prophet Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam as being part of the religion, c. to give up prayer, ect. We know from history, that this is not so of the people of Nahrawaan. And if you are Shia, you will know this because Ali himself said they were not infidels/disbelievers.

To have doubt, to me personally, means, that the people of Nahrawaan's belief in Allah and the hereafter was weak. This is not evidenced at all, and is contradicted entirely for any Shia scholar who would state it is so by Ali's own statement about the people of Nahrawaan: "From infidelity they have already fled; and a hypocrite seldom remembers Allah." [Al-Baihaqi Al-Kubra Vol. p. 334, narrative no. 17189]. Meaning, Ali himself in history acknowledged that the people of Nahrawaan remembered Allah frequently. In fact, the people of Nahrawaan are always mentioned as praying constantly, especially by Sahaba companion Ibn Abbas, and Ali.

As for whether or not Ali crushed them with arguments and defeated them, he did indeed defeat them in the skirmish battle at Nahrawaan. But with force, not arguments. To clarify this, from Ali himself : "They are the people who have rebelled against us, and we have been given victory over them." None of Ali's arguments changed the so-called Khawarijites opinion, for indeed, Ali himself had been of the same opinion as them originally about Muawiya's tactic of raising the Qu'ran copies on spearheads saying "what is between these pages is the judgement between you and us" to keep the war away from them awhile while they were at the disadvantage to Ali's forces. Short history lesson: Ali's side had ALREADY tried negotiating with Muawiya's side on NUMEROUS occasions. Ali was no fool and realized a pause in the fighting right now was advantageous to Muawiya. Originally, like the people of Nahrawaan, he did not wish to agree to this truce, but the majority of his fighters did so he changed his position. Historically sahih (from a Sunni perspective) ahadith also corroborate from Muawiyia's advisor Amru bin Al Alas himself that this was not a sincere act of truce, but a military tactic. "Let us raise copies of the Qu'ran on spearheads as a sign of wishing to end this war… so that we may stop Ali's forces and weaken their strength." [Al Yaaqubi Taarikh Al Yaaqubi, Vol. 2, p 188].

Ali would have been in no position to persuade the so-called Khawarijites with arguments, seeing as he had originally stood adamantly with them. In fact, the people of Nahrawaan's arguments were so compelling that companion Ibn Abaas was persuaded by them. It is my personal belief after reading all accounts from Sunni and Shia sources of the incident, that Ali would have preferred to stand on the same side of the fence as the people of Nahrawaan, who rejected the pseudo truce agreement shouting "There is no judgement except that of Allah." Except that it was NOT the wish of majority whom he led, and since it led to disunity he was quoted saying "That is the word of truth behind which wrong is intended." [Al Tabari Al Taarikh Vol. 6, p. 17 (and numerous others sources saying the same, both sunni and shia)].

If you believe that Ali was sinless like Mohamed salalahu alahi wa salaam (I do not), you would have to believe that by saying that Ali meant that the people of Nahrawaan were right, but that there was more to be considered than that alone. Or, authoobillahi minash shaytaani rajeem, astighfuraAllah, that Ali received Divine revelation from Allah (I totally DOOOOOOOOOO NOT and believe to believe so IS shirk). If you think it is meant literally, than this would be a mistake of Ali's as no man is allowed to judge or assume intention. I say this with authority because of the case that a disbeliever proclaimed "la ilaha il Allah" and a Sahabi slew him. When asked by Mohamed salalalhu alahi wa salaam why he did so, the Sahabi said, "He did not do so except in fear of the sword." The Prophet angrily asked him: "Have you split his heart to see what exists therein?" So without Divine revelation, no man can pass judgement on another man's intention.

We know that the action of the people of Nahrawaan were honest, and even Ali says it was the truth. They rejected the false truce under the same pretexts that Ali had given for the war having been justified in the beginning. Perhaps, later having reconsidered what he knew about judging intentions to be for Messengers and Allah alone, Ali came to rule his followers about the "khawarij": "Do not kill the Khawarij after me, for he who seeks the truth but mistakes is unlike he who seeks misguidance intentionally [Muawiyia and his Syrian forces]. Scholars will say that Ali speaks of Muawiyia as one who seeks misguidance intentionally, and the Khawarij as those who do so accidently, but I feel more Ali was speaking about his own followers, when they chose to make the truce in error. BTW, the last statement is biased so feel free to strike through if you like. This is me trying to give Ali an out for a mistake I believe history would have him make.

At least from Ali's opinion, and thus I must conclude what should be the Shia one regardless of what their scholars say, the Khawarij didn't leave Islam like they regard Muawiyia to have done. They still regard them as Muslims, but as Muslims who will not follow majority opinion if it contradicts what they know of Qu'ran.

I have not found a single Sunni source that can tie in the "what is Khawarij" with "who" the Khawarij are purported to be alas. Abu Dawood says of the people of Nahrawaan "They are no people who follow their prejudices… they are the people whose traditions are the most authentic" and even Ibn Taymiyya says: "they are well known to speaking the truth to the extent that the traditions narrated by them are the most authentic of all" [Minhaj Al Sunnah Vol. 3, pg. 3]. So much so for the old "they innovated" argument, then I guess.

CONCLUSION:

SUNNI: So the Sunni technical description of "Khawarij" is people who are adamant followers of the Prophet Mohamed's traditions and honest to the point of being highly quoted by all ahadith scholars, yet they [people of Nahrawaan] left Islam and created the first disunity (which they didn't) somehow by disregarding Ali's military decision which cannot be evidenced from any of their decisions/actions concerning creed and tauhid, especially when reading from the perspective of respected companion and sahabi Ibn Abaas.

BTW, I follow Ibn Abaas over a lot of Sunni Scholars. For instance, he said the eye rims [aka kohl applied in the rim of the eye, makeup of the time upon the Salaf] was halal and what is apparent of. Yet I've never read Saudi Sheikh Ibn Baaz say the same right? Ibn Abaas walked with Rasoolulah. I'm going to take his word first, unless the hadith is proven to be fabricated or inaccurate ect.

???? (This is KIND OF why I don't follow scholars blindly when I can have daleel [Islamic evidence] instead).

SHIA: The Khawarij are those who rebelled against Ali's majority forces' decision to accept Muawiyia's fake truce. They were neither the first callers of disunity, nor did they leave Islam, but their actions are regarded as an innocent but misinformed mistake. [This is me taking Imam Ali over Shia scholars because he's more authorative I'd figure].

OOOOOR Ali himself admits his forces majority were mistaken, as I concluded [not a shia though so my opinion here doesn't count].

IBADHI: The people of Nahrawaan did not go out of Islam, but defended it to the letter even from their friends and allies. If the definition of Khawarij is one who rebels against a right leader, the people of Nahrawaan believe a leader must always lead by Qu'ran and Shariah and within its pretexts, and not simply be a leader regardless of Shariah legality. If right leader means someone injust, who disregards Qu'ran and sunnah, then this is not Islam they have gone out from, but from tyranny and corruption.

(K, I am not Ibadhi, and I don't know yet about LATER Nahrawaanese practices of Islam, but I agree about RIGHT LEADER).

So technical definitions now all dealt with in the highly confusing mess that they are, we will now delve into how the term "Khawarij" has been used historically.

What are YOUR thoughts on this thus far? Any takers?

The Technical Meaning of the Term "Khawarij" pt. 1

2011-03-24T10:31:00.001-07:00

The core of the subject of whether or not there is a sect called "khawarij" depends entirely on your technical description of the word. Muslim scholars use different expressions to imply the technical meaning of the term "khawarij" but a technical description MUST, absolutely MUST contain who and what the Khawarij are to be concrete.

Al-Shahrastani [Al-Milalu Wa Al-Nihal Vol. 1, p. 129] has defined the Khawarij as: "Anyone that goes against a right leader upon which the majority has agreed [to have him for a leader], is called a Khawarij; be it against the Rightly-Guided Caliphs during the time of the Prophet's companions or against the followers of the Prophet's companions as well as against leaders at any time."

Al-Shahrastani's classification of course makes imperative the defining also of a "right leader".

Shia believe the right leaders of Islam to have been the Prophet Mohamed's family, daughter Fatimah, and son-in-law Ali due to interpretation of hadith, and following, their children. Sunni believe the companion Abu Bakr, the prophet Mohamed's father-in-law due to his marriage to Aisha, the same, according to the same hadith by another interpretation and consensus at the time of Rasoolulah's death, up until Ali, and sometimes Umar ibn Abdul-Aziz.

I personally believe the same definition of "rightly guided" as Al-Sharastani. That any Caliph [rightly guided leader of the Muslims] is just any pious and just Muslim leader that leads a Muslim state in compliance with Islamic law, as the Prophet Mohamed salalalhu alahi wa salaam did. Though for reason that will be explained shortly, I'm not sure if I buy his technical definition yet.

I believe the first Caliph would have to have been

a.) Appointed in accordance with the teachings of the Holy Qu'ran and Prophetic traditions. [I favor Abu Bakr, so do Sunni, and Ibadhi though both do not agree on the historical leadership after Umar, and Shia favor Ali]

And any Caliph existing now or before would have/had to:

b.) The Caliph must lead in accordance with those teachings and does not go contrary to them.

c.) The Caliph has not stepped down nor has he been deposed.

Al-Shahrastani means by rightly guided Caliphs specifically: Abu Bakr, Umar, Uthman, and Ali. If that is his technical definition as intended, then many Al-Shahrastani would never have labelled as Khawarij also fall under that label, including Talha, Zubair, and Muawiya... who rebelled against Ali [rightly guided Caliph] during his Caliphate.

That is the flaw in Al-Shahrastani's [and most Sunni scholars who I have thus far examined] classical technical definition I suppose [though I'd put modern day Qutbists and Osama Bin Ladens as Khawarij with no problem in breath and no Ibadhi would stop me from that] . That this technical definition's "what" does not make clear its "who".

Al-Shahrastani's definition of "what" the Khawarij are may encompass Aicha R.A, Talha, Zubair, and Muawiya, but when you ask the scholars of both Sunni and Shia who the first Khawarij were they will say the people of Nahrawaan (the Ibadhis).

But the funny thing about Sunnis especially holding the people of Nahrawaan as the first Khawarij not Talha and Zubair and Muawiya? Well, for one, Ali was no longer Caliph in the Sunni take on history when the people of Nahrawaan "went out" from his leadership.

Another meaning of "a right leader" can also be taken to mean a Muslim leader regardless of the means by which they have come to power or the legitimacy and legality of his political existence according to Islamic law.

I don't agree with a "Caliph" ever being this.

If this definition of a right leader is used then I am for sure Khawarij and proud of it. But historically, so would ever Muslim in history be. Sunnis would be Khawarij because they sided with Muawiya, Ibadhis would be Khawarij because they disagreed with Ali, Shia would be khawarij because Al-Hasan ibn Ali revolted against Muawiya, and Al Hussain organized a campaign in Iraq against the Umayyad leaders.

That doesn't work to clarify at all, does it.

Thus we can conclude that we are either lacking a a more definitive definition of "right ruler" or that Al-Shahrastani's "what" definition of Khawarij, is, er, lacking the ability to clarify the "who".

When trying to research this technical definition I ran into a problem. The technical definition is supposed to be the 'what' and the 'why'. Most scholars ignore what "khawarij" is supposed to be, assuming already that the people of Nahrawaan are "it" whatever that is disregarding the flaws of trying to be technical about it all, and launch into merely giving reasons they have been thus labelled, and listing actions they are purported to have done/do.

Most commonly, as related by Ibn Hajar [Al-Fat-Hu, Vol. 14, p. 8524] and Al Shawkani [Sharhu Al-Nayl, Vol. 7, p 164] we hear: "The word Khawarij is a plural form of the word Kharijah, which means group. They have been so-called because they have gone out of the religion and because they have innovated matters once not existed."

Ibadhi will argue Sunni innovate, Shia will argue Sunni innovate, Sunni will argue Ibadhi and Shia innovate. So that definiton (technically unsound as it is lacking "what" and "who") will be no avail to this study either.

One problem I have found in my study so far of the Khawarij (and please enlighten me if you found a better what and who then I have) is that in both classical and modern works on the subject there has been no cohesion between the definition and the conclusion. And that often when a definition of "what" is used, other that fall under "who" of that what are excluded for no logical or scientific reason.

The most respected statement (of course not by the Khawarij themselves;D) about the Khawarij is by Ibn Taymiyyah Al-Harrani [Al Tasfir Al Kabir Vol. 2, p. 8]. Ibn Taymiyyah says as for "who": "Khawarij are the first callers of disunity in Islam." Explaining: "The first disunity in Islam [was] after the murder of Uthman and the division of the Muslims, and when Ali and Muawiya agreed on making arbitration, the Khawarij opposed and proclaimed that: 'There is no judgement except that of Allah' and they disassociated themselves from the mainstream."

The Shia were already here, divided from the Sunni, and likewise, so any student of history might wonder at Ibn Taymiyyah calling the people of Nahrawaan [who historically opposed the arbitration between Muawiyia and Ali as a trick of Muawiyia's] the first callers of disunity. I know I do. Another case of same cases, different rulings. Also, Ibn Taymiyyah's definition of splintering one's self from Ali alone would not make one Khawarij as Ibn Taymiyyah himself does not consider companion Ibn Abbaas who left Ali (who personally considered war agaainst those of Nahrawaan unjustified) for Mecca, to be Khawarij. Even if you changed his definition to mean " the act of splintering from Ali combined with war against Ali" you'd have to say that Talha and Zubair were Khawarij too, and no one does. Some use the term "disbelievers" but not specifically "Khawarij". What's the difference one might ask? To go out from Islam is to disbelieve.

More to come. What do you think so far? Who are the Khawarij to you and if so, do you know why you consider them Khawarij? What does one have to believe/do to be Khawarij?

The Literal Linguistic Meaning of the Term "Khawarij"

2011-03-24T07:24:00.001-07:00

To begin. What does "Khawarij" mean?

The word "Khawarij" is a plural form of the word "Kharijah" in fusah (formal Arabic).

Although in spoken Arabic it is common to refer to a single person as "Kharijiy" and to many as "Khawarij" which is quite different than the correct morphological rules of the Arabic language.

To make everything simple, "Khawarij" linguistically means "a group that has come out or gone out".

Sheikh Nasir Al Sabi'i stated that Ibn Al Faris has referred to the term linguistically as having two meanings, one being to pass through a thing, and another to differ in colours.

So linguistically, that's what Khawarij is supposed to mean: "One who has gone out or coming out."

The question most important to understand the term logically when we use it, is to determine what exactly is meant by going out or coming out.

Having determined the linguistic meaning of khawarij, which neither Sunni, Shia or Ibadhi will argue over, we must next state the technical meaning of the word "Khawarij".

SECTS IN ISLAM- writing "Al Khawarij"---also known as Ibadhi

2011-03-24T07:12:00.001-07:00

Belated, I bring to you my promised beginning of the study into Sects in Islam by taking a closer look at their own logics and entities. I chose to start with the "Kwararij" because the majority of Muslims consider them to be the first original sect or division in Islam, whereas they [the Ibadhi] maintain that they are the only believers still on the right path, or at the very least, that they have the earliest sahih ahadith collection and that most other Muslims follow scholars or political leaders that have corrupted the Prophet's tradition.

I actually tried very hard to get someone from the Omani Ministry of Awqaf and Religious Affairs to write this piece but his response to me basically was, "seek and you shall find the truth", handing me of a bunch of books they don't give out to the regular convert. Which basically was saying that he trusted me to write honestly my findings.

I was given the titles "Ibadism in History Volume I: The Emergence of the Ibadhi School" by Ali Yahya Muammar, published by the Ministry of Awqaf and Religious Affairs; "The Overwhelming Truth, a Discussion of Some Key Concepts in Islamic Theology" by Ahmad b. Hamad al-Khalili [Grand Mufti of Oman], published by the Ministry of Awqaf and Religious Affairs; a book they are currently attempting to translate explaining why Ibadhi pray as they do which is unavailable to the general reader at this time; "Al-Khawarij: Reality or Legend" by Juma Muhammad Rashid Al Mazumi, published originally in Tanzania in Swahili. These are my sources from drawing an Ibadhi perspective. Please forgive what I do not know. I do not call myself Ibadhi.

****Hey, I already got one rude and ignorant comment on this post. I knew it was going to be controversial but hey, that was quick, and in good form. So I better make an ammendment****

No anonymous comments are further going to be posted on the exploring sects in Islam series on ILH. Pick an acronym.

Also, don't use insults or a term without an intellectual TECHNICAL & LINGUISTIC account for it.

In case you didn't read, which ANON. [just another ignorant purporting ignorance based on wrong assumptions] obviously didn't, I posted before on the blog, the whole point of this series is to explore terms and definition INTELLECTUALLY, based on their historical date, linguistic make-up, technical definition, purported definitions, ect.

When you call someone "evil" you damn well better have some scholaristic backing for your "new" sect lol.

Anyways, I just wanted to say, anon. you are wrong about the "secret" books. Because.

a. I named the titles of the books that are readily available upon request from the Islamic Ministry of Oman. At your request, they will be made available. They are not "secret" or I'd not have named them, and they certainly wouldn't have given them to a sunni, me, not exactly known for keeping her opinions to herself. The book I did not name is not available as of yet so I won't quote it alot. They were kind enough to loan me their own copy which is still undergoing editing and the whole publishing process. You could say I talked them out of it. I also haven't met yet with their ahadith scholars, but intend to, for a very long sit down about why they don't like some Sahih Al Bukhari ahadiths. I won't call anyone wrong until I know how they are wrong, why they are wrong, and how I might be wrong. It's a new goal for me in this life. You should try it too anon;p

b. They are not regular hand-outs for converts because most converts wanna know how to pray and read Qu'ran and wear hijab, or at least read the seerah before going in depth like Khalili's book really does. It is on intellectual Shariah and alot of other goodies you need a more scholaristic background to get some benefit out of. It is actually a hard read for me in places, a bit like reading an encyclopedia or studying for the bar exam.

c. Since one of the books deals on Shariah law and namely, how an Immamate Caliphate runs, it talks about stuff too in depth for someone who doesn't know how the Prophet Mohamed lived his life and lead the Muslims. For example, in Ibadhism, a Caliph who is corrupt and only claims to be Muslim but leads the people in corruption, must be replaced by way of the book's interpetation of Shariah. The educated religious men of Oman don't really want some idiot only reading one sentance and going out assassinating Sultan Qaboos or something cuz he doesn't get it. They knew from questioning me that I knew enough to not to be dangerous to myself or others. Anon, I'd be iffy on lending YOU the book, cuz you don't know how to read it all and get the big picture.

For those who can't be nice (or even just smart) in the exploring sects edition posts on ILH, why don't you just stick with the fashion posts? Most minds can handle those;D

Style Evolution: My Own

2011-03-17T14:21:00.000-07:00

I think it is especially neat [yeah... I couldn't come up with a better word than 'neat', I'm lame I know] how we evolve as Muslimahs, in both wisdom of the deen, and of course, our hijab style. This blog has of course, been a place for both for me, and I want to thank you all for sharing that journey with me. In thanks, I am trusting you with the closest glimpse into my life as of yet [unless, of course, you've met me in person], some photos of me in niqab, and some of my face, though usually obstructed by something, and my surroundings.

Or photos some particularily nasty I-hope-not-a-sister computer saavy person stole off my FB that are already floating around on the net. And of a sister they thought was my sister-wife. Watch out Aalia, lol. That pic had a virus anyway so they couldn't use it. And Aalia is not my sister wife. Or Boxie. My sister wife is an Arab sister, my age, with children. Both Boxie and Aalia are younger than me, and not Arab. And not currently entertaining being co-wives with anyone.

This person also managed to lift photos of me without my hijab from emails that got hacked (some people have alot of time on their hands). Anyways, to the anonymous who cheered me today with the comment "Lady, nobody cares about your life in Allahuackbar land" lol X:D, well obviously some creepy folks do, so I am gonna blow it off, and say peace to ya'll. Know if you see some photos of me in tight clothes with makeup and blonde hair, well, that was taken in my home around maharams, so don't think I've left Islam and taken my hijab off like this weird person tries to say.

Back to the original reason for this post... I wanted to do it....Because...

I was just discussing with another sister how hard a struggle it was without the means for shopping sprees and lack of halal clothing in the West as a new Muslimah, and why alot of non-muslims see Muslim women as suppressed, and why women & young girls hesitate to wear hijab sometimes.

When I first started wearing hijab I had the problem first of not knowing it was supposed to be loose fitting, after that, that jilbab was obligatory when a woman leaves her home [yet not INSIDE her home, there loose fitting clothing suffices], and after that, trying to find clothes that did and were everything they were supposed to be Islamically and a. did not make me look like a grandma, b. did not look like a thrift store heap [hey, thrift store stuff can be waaaaaaay cool but shopping on a budget and with time constraints can be hard], and c. did not in any way resemble the death-eaters from Harry Potter cuz that freaks non-Muslims right out.

After a few years I'd saved and splurged and got enough clothes that fit their Islamic purpose to feel confident I started to realise why it seemed non-muslims percieve us as suppressed. They often see hijabis jilbabi and niqabis walking around in ill-fitting (and sometimes frankly, uuuuuuuugly [but it was the only thing available]), and uncomfortable clothing. #1 that makes a woman feel like crap, and is probably less confident as a result of it. I know from personal experience, when I were cheap niqabs with elastics that cut into my nose or dig in my eyes, I'm a tad confrontational to boot.

After I got over the stages of struggle, and gained confidence, I had to learn to diffientiate culture from Islam, and fight the pressures to Arab-ize, or less islam-ize my wardrobe. I like alot of Arab things still, so they fit into my personal style, but I don't just follow one culture over others at all times, and even if I like something, like gamboo3a hair clips, I don't follow the trend if I learn and become convinced it contradicts my Islam. To my fiqh, gamboo3a do. To each their own fiqh so don't hate on me for that! Sisters through fiqh and thin remember.

Since then I've had fun experimenting, arguing, and shopping all over the map, but it comes down to to these few style rules universal for Muslimahs who want to wear hijab as stated in the sunnah and Qu'ran:

Loose fitting---non see-through (and not perfumed) clothing around non-maharam men
Around non-maharam men cover your chests with your khimars (and your neck and hair!!!!)
Jilbab is worn when you leave the house and know jilbab may be any overgarment that allows you to wear clothing fit for salat underneath of it.
Don't loose your personality and the things you like, such as a design, a colour or a pattern so long as it doesn't change the conditions listed above
Islam is your nation when you are a Muslim so any clothing that meets the Islamic conditions should not be made fun of by you, we are defined by our faith and good deeds not our national dress
Do not wear something that another Muslim of a moderate income could never afford to buy
Do not dress in clothing that makes people feel bad for you, like they think you are dirty or poor, if you can afford better
Remember that Allah loves beauty, and that the best garment is rememberance of Allah: hijab is more than the clothes on your back.

I want sisters to know, in that journey, you are not alone. I too, at times, due to lack of modest clothing available, was "a little grandma" or "too thrifty". Better than disregarding Qu'ran right? Yep. So I can live with and smile and share that journey all with you.

So here goes (I'll let the pictures speak for themselves):

And those are the last of the photos I will be posting online of myself anywhere, lol, including FB.

How has your hijab evolved over the years? And if you are a newbie to hijab, what is your biggest struggle?

Things I Intend to Sell pt 1: would you be interested buyers?

2011-03-16T05:23:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time, and there were quite a few set-backs but I have always wanted to make the Western Muslimah's life either easier (with hijab clothing that really IS hijab but it still human-looking to her maybe non-muslim family and friends) and more affordable. So I had a goal of selling (and later designing) Islamic clothing to meet these needs for a long long time. I am going to inshaAllah start these next few months. Right now I am going to tell ya'll about a few first possible products I have in mind and let me know about your enthusiasm for them if any so I can get busy!

I still need to sleuth out the prices for good quality flip niqabs and Emirati Gashwas but these are kind of a mainstay in my closet. They are Salalah-Niqabs, a style unique to the Sultanate of Oman where I reside. They consist of a tie-back head-band which fits all sizes, and a short chin or mid-neck length face veil. This veil may have other layers of fabric underneath giving it a layered looked, but its length and headband identify it as being from Salalah, where the Queen of Sheba hailed from in King Sulaiman's day. Being that the veil is shorter it has the advantage of being safer around children who like to tug on ones niqab (less material for them to get their hands on) and makes eating in public a breeze for me without removing it, unlike my Saudi-flip niqabs. The disadvantage is, if it isn't a layered, longer style (which you can custom order with me) then you have to make sure your khimar/hijab scarf covers your chest or your overhead abaya is a closed-at-the-chin style. I personally love them. They come with no string, a nose-string, or three strings. The three string style cost about $12-15.00 USD, while the other two are available for $3-5.00 USD depending on the quality. Even the lowest quality I could find was still the best compared to what I found ordering from online shops back in the West.Jersey balloon sleeve close-front abayat. I love them a. because they are closed front so I don't have to worry about what I am wearing underneath, b. they are very modest in fit and tend to look good on all body-types, whether thin or super curvy, short or tall, c. here in Oman the front is made of high quality and durable crepe and the jersey sleeves are so lightweight they are not hot AT ALL, and d. in the West I would have loved these because you can choose from any fashion-ey print or clour trend for the sleeves and not stand-out too much from non-muslim family and friends. $45-70.00 USD depending on what deals I can get on the fabrics. $45 would probably be cheap black fabric instead of crepe but if you live somewhere cold that wouldn't matter.

Jazzakallah kheir to all my sisters for your kind duas: and some big news

2011-03-16T04:46:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to make this post to say jazzakallah kheir to all my sisters for you duas. I had done tests with doctors that said I had no eggs and no hormones it appeared to make them but alhamdulilah....

Pixie is going to have, inshaAllah a BABY!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D

Medical Question #1

2011-03-16T04:25:00.000-07:00

When I mentioned that I was fortunate to have the oppurtunity to pose some questions to the leading Islamic medical authority in the Sunni Muslim community in KSA, your most popular question dear readers, was is it okay to get injections with pork gelatin or human embryos.

The Question was posed in two cases, routine BUT beneficial injections, and life-saving ones.

In the case of lifesaving injections the good Dr. and Sheikh said there was no question that pork geletin would be allowed in the injection were there no other means available as in the case of a starving man being allowed to eat pork. Eating human beings was never allowed though so in the case of the embryo being older than period Allah said the soul goes into it, then no, you cannot. Before then, he said if there was no other option it was makruh, but not quite haraam.

As for merely beneficial procedures and injections involving pork geletin or human tad-bits. Haram I am afraid, as by avoiding these substances in cases that are not life threatening, we can encourage halal industries and methods to take their place.

What abaya styles am I wearing in Oman??? pt. 1

2011-03-02T08:00:00.000-08:00

JERSEY BALLOON SLEEVE ABAYAS: Oh how I love these. Number one, they are not hot at all, number two, they are cheap. As in $40-$60 USD. I have both black and numerous prints. They fit on over the head so are pretty hassle free (unless you are breastfeeding or shopping for clothes in a lot of different stores).

WIDE SLEEVE ABAYA (not to be mistaken with flared sleeve of kimono sleeved): In Oman, wide but not flared or kimono-sleeved abayas are major. I have the floral embroidered one pictured above from Al Motihajiba in black. While the colours are lovely, I wear the black one way more. And Al Motihajiba is quality---like $400-800 USD for an abaya so I wanted one that'll last me 10 years. I bought another one with green, red and white crystals one the sleeve for about $160.00 USD from a Kuwaiti abaya boutique in Madinat Qaboos in Muscat.

GRECIAN OR DAS STYLE: Crepe and jersey drapery is all the rage. I call this the Roman/Grecian style. We were the cheap jersey ones day to day but the crepe ones we tend to save for special occasion because they have alot of volume (and tend to stick out of car doors). I have one cheap (about 56.00 USD) jersey version like the one pictured top from the Omani souq, and one quality crepe with a satiny-sheen one like the bottom Noblesse Oblige one (about $340 USD) from Hanayen. All are plain black with oramentation of belts. Makes accessorizing more fun.

Sects in Islam- Pixie's Perspective & Experiences

2011-03-01T04:39:00.000-08:00

What you must know about me before you accuse me of any bias is that I first encountered Islam in the Sultanate of Oman, where I now happily reside. It is a Gulf country unlike its neighbors, having an Ibadhi majority (you’ve probably never heard of them as they call themselves, but the Sunni and Shia call them the Khawarij after events in Islamic history), and a Sunni population in the Balushi Al Batinah, Arab Sur and African and Arab Salalah [sometimes sufi here] areas of the country, and a Shia minority, mainly located in the capital Mutrah area. Here in Oman, we also have churches for Christians and Hindus. The Ibadhi rule our Shariah law, and the Islamic ministry is filled with their scholars giving their fatwas, and yet the religious freedom here and tolerance for all other schools of knowledge is quite unique in the Muslim world. Ibadhism is rigidly fundamental in how fiqh is deriven but as a practice as it exists in Oman, lacks the extremism which is to suppress other voices. Ibadhi Mosques and Bookshops have both Sunni and Shia books available. The same is NOT TRUE for Shia and Sunni bookshops and Mosques in the Sultanate. For one, if you have not been to Zanzibar or Oman, it is doubtful that you have ever heard of the Khawarij as they call themselves.
That is where I first saw Islam. Now, who I first knew as a Muslim:
You must know that the first Muslim who answered my questions about Islam was a Shia sister of the Jaffari school named Samia from the Shia quarter in Mutrah, Muscat, Oman. An Ibadhi sister named Intizar purchased my first Quran for me. An Sunni Omani man from Buhraimi on Oman’s border with the UAE, told me about women’s basic rights in Islam, and dispelled my Western brainwashed stereotypes of suppression of Muslim women.
Samia and Intisar both agreed on the basics of what one is required to understand in order to become a Muslim, and the rights of the Muslim woman, regardless of their highly differentiated vantages of history, and practice, at least, to someone who then knew nothing. Both said Allah is the only God, Mohammed was His messenger, as were many before him, the Qu’ran is perfect, Islam is the true messeage in its purest form.
I obviously agreed, because I converted.
I married a Saudi man from the South of the Arab peninsula who was Sunni, and as a Saudi, obviously studied on the writings of Abdul-Wahab on Tauhid (the Oneness of Allah). As I am also, and I agree 100% with what he wrote about Tauhid. People will label me a Wahabi for that. I am not, nor was Abdul-Wahab, the scholar. Do I agree with his politics and those who use his writings, and other writing besides those he had on Tauhid? Not in majority, no.
As I mistakenly said to one sister on blogger when I was too naïve on the subject of sects to know any better “you just became Shia because your husband is Shia!” so others will say to me, that is why I became a Sunni.
This is not so. But to that sister, forgive me my ignorance, and I ask Allah to forgive me.
My husband did not care what I became and never told me who I was, that I was praying Sunnah ect, so long as I stayed close to what the Prophet Mohamed followed and used my brain. That’s how I got to Islam in the first place wasn’t it? So that had to be the right way.
He has friends who are Shia and talks easily with all people and I followed his example in this in life [if not on blogger :Ooo]. I had never heard of Ibadhi anything then, or Sufis, or Ahmedis, and I knew the Qu’ran warned us against dividing ourselves into sects, so when a non-muslim or Muslim would ask me, “are you Sunni or Shia?” I would say, “We are not supposed to split ourselves up. I am just a Muslim.”
That was a more correct answer in its innocence and naivety, than my later ones in their ignorance and error, believe me. Alhamdulilah Allah has guided me to a straighter path than one of a parrot who repeats only what they have overheard.
I met sister Aalia from her blog Chasing Jannah, a Sunni who takes the Malaki school of thought in the majority of her fiqh but is not ruled by one school of Islamic jurisprudence. Her husband was Emirati and quite learned on the subject of jurisprudence and he introduced me to important things for Muslims just starting to go beyond the basics of the religion to know. For example, how a fatwa (religious ruling) cannot be derived from one piece of Islamic evidence, but the whole body of evidence and history in its entirety. He also educated Aalia, others, and myself on terms misused by Muslims, and the West, such as “fundamentalism”, “extremist”, “Wahabi”, “Qu’ran-only Muslim”, “Salafi”…
Our Sunni-majority Mosque had a South African Imam [Sheikh Younas Kathrada] of the Hanbali way of deriving fiqh, but he’d tell you all the others too, if you asked. The majority of the Saudi women I knew were strictly Hanbali-Sunnis, and they didn’t know how look for daleel, they just wanted fatwas from KSA, regardless of the evidence. A lot of Shaffi and Hanafi sistas from Egypt and Syria were the same within their school of jurisprudence. Alhamdulilah for my Sheikh there having an email. He may have been strict, but he was one of the best Sunni Sheikhs I have ever met if you asked him beyond what he’d stated not always so pleasantly in the Khutbah. BTW, if you google Sheikh Younas, you’ll find all this nasty stuff about him sending some revert to make a bomb in Chechnya and hating the Jews, and really, that man HATED anyone who murdered innocent women and children and civilians going about their lives whether Muslim or Jewish, so never ever allowed violence in Islam against innocents. And he embodied the Islamic message that races and nations had no priority or status beyond their faith and good works.
I admit, I gravitate toward the Hanbali manner of jurisprudence, though I often disagree with the Saudi jurists. I find that the more literal, and more stricter interpretation, is safer. But I do not believe whatsoever in being ruled by one way of looking at Islamic evidence, and find the Saudi Hanbali tend to take one piece of daleel literally, disregarding the rest, and make a fatwa from that. I cannot. It strips Islam of its soul, its spirituality. And no, I am not a sufi. Islam has only one correct path, the path handed down to the prophets and exampled by Mohamed S.A.W.
I have a Shia friend named C whose husband is Afghani-Pakistani. The way she practices her Shiism, with no stone with the name of Hussain in her salat and no visiting of graves, and mainly just a political belief that Ali should have been Caliph before Abu Bakr, Umar, and Uthman, does not make me bat an eyelash. I always felt she was my sister, and I know my Masjid through one Shia brother out forcibly on the men’s side, but I would have physically fought anyone who’d try to out or touch my girl C. She’s on a straighter path than many so-called righteous Muslims at that Mosque.
I also met a group of highly educated Bahraini and Iranian sisters who were more strictly Shiite. They were Jaffari. Because I did not hate them and call them Kufar from Islam like many in my Mosque would, they gave me books on their Islamic histories. Unfortunately, I found that the life and actions of the Prophet Mohamed was not as emphasized in importance, as later historical events, which are lesser in importance in jurisprudence to me, and only important in a political historical sense. I did not become Shia because a great deal of literature is from the period of the Persian empire and influenced by its culture, such as the Imam Madhi birth story (pure fiction and wholly inaccurate). Yet I did find a lot of their {EARLY} history to have some bearing of truth to it, where Sunni history glossed over some corruption and bad decision making of those it supports. And yet, I could never ever adhere to the sect of Ahlu Al-Beit School [Shia] because I do not believe the Prophet Mohamed’s bloodline is superior to the knowledge and faith and good works of others on that merit alone, also I have found historically accurate documents that Ali made mistakes and things that the Prophet Mohamed told us not to do such as burn anyone to death regardless of their actions in life as an enemy of Islam. Additionally, and I DO believe these are bidas introduced to the followers of Ali’s house, not bidas Ali himself would ever have supported, may Allah reward him, such as asking for intercession from the dead, visiting graves with any purpose other than to pray for forgiveness Muslims buried in them, praying on a stone with Hussain’s named on it, hit one’s self or grieve on Ashura for Hussain… Also, I met one Iranian Shia lady who said to my face that Aisha, the Prophet’s wife, was a whore, astighfurallah.
I know not all Shia curse the Sahaba, not all Shia hit themselves or even grieve Ashura, or pray with stones with the name of Hussain on them. So I am deeply, deeply sorry if I have ever generalized. I have used the term wrong, and also understand, Shia themselves reject the Ahmadi sect from Islam for their acts of kufar. Just like I insist that my Sunni brothers and sisters who do mass duas together after salat in congregation are performing a bida, one you even see in the Masjid Al Haraam. Did Rasoolulah ever do that people? Other than for rain? Think, before you do.
I find myself now defending the acts of some of my shia sisters that may be expressed as mere sunnahs (and would only be made haraam if were stated as fards or necessary acts in Islam) because so many other Muslims are ignorant of WHY, when they themselves might not even know why what they do is right, astighfuraAllah.
On discussing why we had not converted to Shiaism, although we knew our shia friends in many ways to be better examples of Muslims than our Sunni and Ibadhi friends, a Sunni friend from Sur, Oman remarked: “While I did not agree with almost anything I read they gave me to read and to study, I will give the Shia one thing. At prayer time, their Mosques are full, while ours are empty.”
I told people I was “Ahlu Al-Sunna wa al-Jama’a” because to me, Sunni clearly means to follow the sunnah. But of course, Sunni, shia, and Ibadhi all claim to do that. But regardless of what you call me, I have decided to no longer call myself that, I will let my actions and faith define my doctrine, and will endeavor that those actions always go back to the Prophet Mohamed, what he enjoined, and what he forbid, and nothing, nothing else.
Which has ALSO made me question some things which I am told all those who are Sunni must believe. So because I live in Oman now, I must have gone all “Khawarij” and “out from Islam, i.e Ibadhi”.
Nope;D, I drive the Ibadhi Islamic Ministy in Oman insane with my request for Islamic translations to english, and proof of sahih chains of narrations, too.
As I study Islamic history more and more (I had always had a pretty good background on the Seerah and the benefit of pre-Islamic times due to studying early Christian politics and influences in pre-Islamic times) I question more and more these terminologies that divide and cage us.
Through-out ideo-political history, negative and positive terminologies have been used to hide and disguise the truth. In the world where I come from, the West, democracy and its pillars of- freedom of speech, human rights, pluralism, ect- have always been the pretexts for a Capitalistic agenda to justify exploitation of the poor and oppression of the weak minorities, even the exploitation of the female sex. The Western/European ideo-politico-cultural war against Islam has arrived with new terminologies, “terrorist” supplanting “defending his own land” and “fundamentalism” for “those actually trying to practice their religion by more than lip service” serving well to legitimize Western policies towards Muslim lands, while the term “democracy” legalizes this Alien’s political supremacy.
The same is so sadly true in the history of Islam. When the early divisions occurred: Ahlu Al-Sunna wa Al-Jama’a, Ahlu Al-haqqi Wal Istiqama, Ahlu Al-Bait, and Al-Khwarij, many titles were created and used with the object of stigmatizing others as heretics. As a result, the Muslim Ummah has only these names as criteria by which to distinguish the orthodox sects from the ones that take one away from Islam. VEEERRRRRRRRY confusing, to both born AND new Muslims, I assure you, since many people tend to just follow what they initially taught or hear, good and bad names have played important roles and have had very far-reaching effects in the overall history of Islam.
To be honest, as someone who has been labeled “Extremist”, “Wahabi”, “Shia-lover”, “Salafi terrorist”, “Feminist”, “Islamist”, and “Khawarij” all within a stint of five short years, and I guarantee you, I am not that big of a flopper, labels alone are no good at all to define someone’s doctrine, the core of their faith, and the method of their actions.
Islamic sects must be studied in terms of their own logics and entities intellectually.
To prove my point, just about anyone who knows what extremists are, will know that I am not one since I think the use of cosmetics around non-Maharam is halal, and that Wahabi is an incorrect term, that I love some of my Shia friends but that that sect isn’t my home, that to be a salafi is to use just the daleel from the Islamic historical period of the Salaf and anyone one doing so won’t blow themselves or civilians up, feminists believe in having all the same things as men and I believe in only having my Islamic rights as a woman, I guess Islamist means one wants an Islamic government but I would settle for an educated Muslim majority population before I’d be so naïve as to cry for that, and Khawarij means one who goes against the rightly guided Caliphs which I wasn’t around to have done so. So, as you can see, a label simply being good or bad isn’t enough to understand whether or not a doctrine is correct or not.
So… my endeavor into studying the sects begins.

How has my hijab style changed since moving to the Gulf?

2011-02-07T00:43:00.000-08:00

A sister said she'd be interested to hear how my hijab style had changed since moving to the Gulf.

Well, for one thing, I no longer favour Khaleeji glam embellished abayas covered with colours. Maybe cuz I live somewhere where this isn't the classiest act in town anymore???

Also, in North America, I liked to go more for embellishments as this made non-Muslims less afraid. I don't have to care about that here in Oman, alhamdulilah.

I tend to go plain black but stylish new shapes, and a plain black shayla with a plain black niqab. I have so many abaya styles, Islamiyia, Abaya Raas, Baloon Sleeves, Grecian, Bisht, Farasha, Suri, ect... I love them in plain black. I find it easier to express myself with the cut and design rather than the embellishment. I also tend to favour closed front styles.

It is not that I think this is more religious or more correct, but I like to save my money, and you can mix and match with a plain black abaya waaaaaaaaaaaaay more. Also, in Oman, it is totally okay to wear coloured hijabs, and we have some pretty cute ones.

I would love to wear coloured abayas the same as my black ones, of cute cuts, but that'd make people whistle at me here, so I refrain as much as I want to call these black-only ignorants out for making rules in Islam for what ISN'T a RULE.

I wear more creative coloured outfits in people's homes, because around non-maharam, I still have to wear hijab, and here I can wear any form of jilbab, from Omani, to Saudi, to Emirati, to Canadian and Iranian, and it doesn't matter one bit.

But outside the house, just for pure ease (and maybe I aM GROWING UP??? LOL) I like luxury black abayas, and quality niqabs and shaylas that are easy to wear. I am saving my MAJOR cash for house clothes like cute shoes, jewelry, and dresses, which is more important here in the Gulf. Whereas, I found, in the West, one has to be very careful with their wardrobe so non-Muslims find them interesting enough to accept dawah from:)

When going back to Canada, I am DEFINATELY getting some coloured versions of my abayaat made, as well some embellished khaleeji styles, but I tend to hate the crystalized abayaa as the crystals just don't last as long as quality embroidered ones, no matter the name brand. I also tend to wear headbands and broaches on my hijab in Canada, whereas here in the GCC, I totally don't. Because they look not as classy as my sleek niqabs and shalyas;)

Do you ladies have any Medical/Health questions you want answered Islamically?

2011-02-07T00:28:00.000-08:00

Dear Sisters,

Alhamdulilah, these weeks upcoming, I am fortunate to be able to meet with the Muslim world's leading (living) authority of medicine in the Qu'ran and Sunnah [I am so bad, I forget his name lol, but I'm sure if you have any of the books on health and medicine published from Daralsalam he's quoted in there, having been a good friend with Sheikh Ibn Baz and being a bonafide real M.D quite respected by the folks from Harvard and the like;)] regarding pursuing my Islamic history studies.

So, IF you have any questions at all to do with health, medicine, ect, and you want an opinion from an Islamic authority on the matter, leave them here, and I'll try to ask him as many questions as I can;). InshaAllahkheir.

I have a question about flies. There's hadith about disease being on one wing, and the cure on the other. I want to know all about the science, and also, of course, the chain of narration;)

It is a PRETTY COOL and unique oppurtunity for me to blast of my mouth on all I don't know (and don't have the inclination to research for myself) and I thought I'd share that oppurtunity with ya'll.

Modesty-Make-Over: outfit #4 from the movie "the Tourist"

2011-01-31T06:58:00.000-08:00

Click on the image to enlarge.

Modesty Make-Over: outfit #3 from the movie "The Tourist"

2011-01-31T06:53:00.000-08:00

Click on the image to enlarge.

Modesty Make-Over: outfit #2 from the movie "the Tourist"

2011-01-31T06:49:00.000-08:00

Click on the image to enlarge.

Modesty Make-Over: outfit #1 from the movie "The Tourist"

2011-01-31T06:44:00.000-08:00

Click on the image to enlarge.

Understanding Islam Today: Traditionalists, Revivalists, and Reformers

2011-01-30T21:27:00.000-08:00

BTW, before I write this post, I want to credit sister Nida from her blog "In the Shade of Islam", and my friends from our OPNO blog for inspipring and letting me re-post all these bits for ILH readers, even though I originally made the post for the OPNO blog.

This post came about from an argument between MOP & his wife, an OPNO author, about women praying in the Mosque with no barrier or wall between the women and the men of the Mosque. As non-muslim, you'd find a men-only Mosque totally sexist. I assure you most adamantly, I do too, and find this story most amusing, and to the point about the state of discussion that intellectually we are in today, regarding the religion of Islam, whether one is Muslim or not.

If you are a Muslimah, you may be on either side of the fence with this one, or trapped, like MOP is, in the middle, behind the barrier, and for knocking it down. So unto the tale:

Being that we were all about on a road trip, we were unable to pray in our individual houses, which is what is BEST/EASIEST/NOT A SIN for women (not men who are not travelling---for men who are not travelling it is a SIN/NO REWARD not to pray in the Mosque). Muslims get this belief that prayer is allowed/better for women in their individual houses, because the Prophet Mohamed, peace and blessings be upon him, told Umm Humayd Al-Sa`idiyyah "A woman's prayer in her house is better than in her courtyard, and her prayer in her own room is better than in the rest of the house." (Chain of narration recorded by Abu Dawud).

MOP's wife reasoned that this is because she can concentrate better on her personal connection with her Creator in her own home and she is physically very safe there. And that women being allowed to pray at home and not having to go to the Mosque as something that is compulsory for them, was a gift from their Creator, making their faith easier to maintain in the days when there was no brith control [for example, women & men were discouraged from bringing children to the Mosques that would interupt or hinder the worship and spiritual/intellectual development of others'] .

MOP's reasoning was that it hard for men to have that same connection to their Creator when a distracting woman is in the Mosque with them, and that if something is not done in the culture, it is merely best to avoid things that are sinful, and that it is not sinful for a woman to offer her prayers in a place that is not a Mosque.You see, dear readers, this whole argument came out from the fact that when we had stopped on our journey, we did indeed find a Mosque, but we could not find one that had an area purposely for women. Mosques in Oman usually have an entirely closed off seperate area for women to pray in. This Mosque it seems, at least in terms of the culture, been built soley for the use of men.

Now had there been such an area for women, I doubt MOP's wife would have argued very much. We are in agreement about the benfits of a woman's only side. There are many advantages to a closed-off women's only area, such as being able to adjust and re-adjust one's clothing, and them not having to worry as much about the Islamic requirements for their clothing, or even breastfeeding babies (not something you do while YOU pray, but something that can be done in an women-only side of a Mosque, and not something SO easily done when prayers are preformed by both the sexes together, and that, when a Mosque is mixed in terms of sexes, the Mosque purely becomes a learning and religious center for women, not a social one, whereas informal socialising may take place easily on a women's only area of a Mosque.

The important factor in the tale I am about to relate, is that in this case, there WAS no seperate women's area, but there was indeed a Mosque.

And, in Omani culture, this Mosque was used only by men.

As MOP's OPNO would argue, a Mosque is built for Islamic culture, not any nationalistic culture, and the rules of the Mosque are the rules of the religion, not those of the place where a Mosque happens to be built. Since there WAS a Mosque, albeit, lacking a seperate woman's prayer area, my dear friend and I had concluded that we would pray in the Mosque, rather than outside the Mosque.

MOP wanted us to pray outside.He was more than willing to pray with us there.

To sway his mind I said the following, quoting a saying of the Prophet Mohamed , peace and blessings be upon him: ""The Prophet (Allah bless him & give him peace) said, “If people knew the reward in praying Fajr and Isha together in the Mosque, they would go to the mosque even if they had to crawl.” And the chain of narration is recorded by Bukhari & Muslim. And the Prophet didn't just say 'if men knew, he said 'if people knew' meaning women too." So MOP related the hadith/saying about women's prayer being best in their homes. To which is my friend intelligently replied: "Habibi, we are far from our houses. But we do have a Mosque. The hadith does not say, 'it is better for women to pray in the courtyard of the Mosque than in the Mosque'. In fact, Allah [God] made it perfectly clear that women are to attend the Mosques in that the Prophet Mohamed told the men "Do not prevent the female servants of Allah from entering the House of Allah [i.e the Mosque]" and from many sayings of the Prophet and historical records, we KNOW that women among the BEST generation of Muslims prayed in the same room with the men, no barrier between them, albeit, in very modest dress void of perfumes, and in the back rows so that guys couldn't check out their butts." She was smirking.

MOP of course, knew it was perfectly halal for women to pray in the Mosque, and that we were all Muslim women dressed in a manner to attend any public event in the presence of men but he reasoned that since it was something regarded as outside the culture, it was ALSO perfectly acceptable to render prayers OUTSIDE the Mosque, and less trouble to do so.

WHYYYYY were there seperate prayer areas for women in Oman? both my friend AND I enquired of poor MOP. MOP said, because it was hard for men to concentrate on their prayers with women in the room. Why was this, all OPNO girls wanted to know (even the non-Muslim one) when the men among the earliest Muslims managed to, without treating the women like meat?

"Because it is a corrupt time for Muslims" MOP helplessly cited, which brought about the true reason for this post.

"More sin now than before?" my lips curled into a sneer at that line of reasoning.

MOP's wife and I are of western education, and both spent time as Muslims in the West. This line of reasoning annoys the heck out of us, because all [well, in Islamic scholarship anyways] Muslims believe that Islam as evidenced in the Qu'ran and practiced/explained by the Prophet Mohamed was the perfect example for all Muslims, for all times.

My girl, picked up from there, as it WAS HER husband afterall. "So you would reason, that we should leave off what was done by the Prophet, because what he left us with isn't good enough? That Islam should be CHANGED to meet these corrupt times?"

Of course, that is not what any decent Muslim Omani man could mean, but that is where his kind of reasoning leads. It leads to Muslims in the West who openly reject the things in their religion that don't so easily fit into their modern lives, like the jilbab and khimar, which takes the form of the black abaya and headscarf, that few Omani men like MOP would want their sisters and mothers and wives to reject. Yet in the West, my friend and I have seen it. Women say, it may be in the Qu'ran as a command, but it doesn't pertain to today. Well, there was no requirement of men and women praying seperate BEFORE but there is today. Same reasoning, opposite lines of the spectrum.

"What harm can come from you praying outside the Mosque?" MOP asked his wife as she shouldered her way past him up the steps of the Mosque as if she couldn't hear his question.

On our way there, an Omani boy, ten years younger than myself, tried to stop us, saying there was no women's Mosque. He did not know, that is was allowed for Muslim women to pray in a Mosque, so long as they did not wear perfume, and did all their Islamic requirements in way of public dress, and did not use the Mosque for purposes other than prayer and education from Islamic lectures. He did not know, clearly, that it is a SIN for a man to forbid a woman from attending the Mosque.

MOP prayed in front of us, we prayed in the back, and another Muslim man, who knew enough of Islam to calm the Omani boy down about us women being there, prayed on the opposite end of the Mosque from out party respectfully a small ways in front, as men are to do in the religion.

When we left the Mosque, OPNO belonging to MOP and he to her respectively, answered his question.: "The harm does not come from praying in the Mosque or outside it, but it lies in your reasoning, and what that reasoning allows us to forget. That boy no more knew what was allowed, than he knows why it is not allowed. Your reason, that it makes men uncomfortable, is not a reason in Islam, as Islam allows women to go where it is necessary and even pleasing and certainly beneficial for them to go. The women of Sahaba [the first Muslims] interacted with men in Islamic capacities where it was halal [not sinful] and beneficial for society for them to, in education, business, and religion. The danger, and it IS evidenced IN OMAN for our Western/Convert eyes to see--- by the way, is that when you seperate us from the Mosque, men stop seeing us equals in the religion, and more as meat. You see us as mothers maybe, and wives, at best, and at worst... If men cannot behave as the Prophet himself behaved at the Mosque, than they have no business/right of being there either."

MOP regarded her desperate plea, and assured us he was on the same side, and wanted very much for these things to be changed, but didn't want his wife to be the one to do it, in the manner that she did.

But then who is to to do it? We asked? Who is to change it?

We all agreed, seperate areas for women had their benefits, and women enjoyed them, but that some women suffered from their inability to approach Imam's weekly or daily with questions, or to recieve the same education and information Muslim men recieve from attending the Mosque regularily.

MOP even admitted to us, that in his village in Oman, women do not come to the Eid prayers, when praying the Eid prayer in congregation is CUMPULSORY on muslim men AND WOMEN, even women who have their periods, ect...

That is the danger of reforming/pseudo reviving of Islam. You lose the right legality, and the true message of it, whether the reform is in a liberal or a conservative direction.

Which brings me to:Today, there are, intellectually, 3 different ways of studying Islam, no matter the sect or manner of jurisprudence within those sects.Now I am stealing these definitions, credit to sister Nida, from her blog http://theidealmuslimah.blogspot.com/2010/12/revivalists-vs-reformers.html, and she's stealing it from Abdelwahab El-Affendi ;):

TRADITIONALISTS
Definition: Those following traditionally approved approaches and methods of interpretation, and basically handing down what has come from before in the same manner as before. These do not wish to update Islam, and seek to do what has always been done ie come to the same conclusion. *many intellectually documented ways of studying & viewing Islam are reform or revival based Islam passed down in the manner of traditionalists but those same types of intellectual Islam would not necessarily BE traditionalist in nature*

REVIVALISTS
Definition: Revivalists distinguish themselves from traditionalists by redefining the tradition into purist terms, while the former tend to accept the traditionl more or less in the context as it was handed down. The purpose of doing so it to impose an idealizized idea of Islam, with a tendancy to instrumentalize religion and to define their movement sociologically, rather than theologically. This can be done in either a very conservative or very liberal manner.

Mr. Abdelwahab El-Affendi's conclusion of this movement in terms of discussing Islam, the same as, and so much more eloquently expressed than my own: "Their version of instrumentalized Islam is spiritually, artistically, and humanly impoverished and narrowly partisan.”

REFORMERS
Definition: Reformers differentiate themselves from Revivalists by interrogating the tradition in more radical ways. Seeking to exploit the differences and conflicts within orthodoxy to eliminate or discredit those aspects of the tradition that have become difficult to defend in the modern era, selectively picking and choosing from various accepted authorities to support their modernizing (usually liberal, but not always) agenda.This approach seeks to work within the confines of orthodoxy while working hard to redefine it. It attempts to develop a radical rereading and reinterpretation of traditional Islamic sources by adapting traditionally approved approaches and methods of interpretation.Ultra-radical reformers launch a frontal attack on traditionalism, sometimes advocating treatment of the Qur’an as a “human” text and using the tools of modern literary criticism to decipher it.

Mr. Abdelwahab El-Affendi observes that "such a deliberate drive for a reformation... is based on copying another (Christian) experience in another religious tradition in another era is condemned from the start to the loss of innocence: it is no longer religious reform but social engineering and intellectual tinkering.” Mr. Abdelwahab El-Affendi wrote, that while reform of Islam is much applauded from non-muslims in the West, that they should be cautious in this as well: “The efforts of U.S.-based Muslim intellectuals to undermine Islamic authoritarianism could warrant an “even more ambitious agenda following up on changes in Islam’s ideology with changes in leadership and religious practices.” Much justifies these ambitions, but ambition must not be allowed to shift to illusion. To move from a valid appreciation of the increasing importance of the intellectual contributions of Western Muslims to a “wag the dog” theory that ascribes to them a leadership role in religious reform may be as misguided (and as dangerous) an illusion as the idea that creating an American colony in Iraq would be an advertisement of America’s love for democracy and an inspiration for freedom lovers throughout the Muslim world. Both illusions spring from the same quintessentially Western overconfidence, even arrogance, of which Muslim Westerners are not immune.”

I wholly agree, as a Muslim who lived in the west, letting the likes of Tariq Fatah and Irshadd Manji speak for me, and represent Islam, is misguided. Though one MIGHT say, the same reform movements exist in Egypt, ect.... to quote Nida who'd say it like I would but better;): "What defines 'progressive' islam is a distinct Western liberal ideology, so anyone ascribing to this ideology, be they American or Egyptian or whatever, is elevating Western ideology above tradition (a universal set of moral and ethical values). I believe the reason why the progressive ideology is popular in places like Egypt is due to the deep rooted colonial and neo-colonial legacy. It is mostly people who have been 'exiled' from their countries and had a 'Western/European' intellectual upbringing who are the leaders of this particular movement."But that does not mean, living here now in Oman, that I am free from the influence and power of such misguided reform movements. As this entire post has been an example of, the same line of reformist thinking exists heavily in even Arab culture.as Nida pointed out, what some call 'revivalism' is in fact reform: "changing the religious interpretations to an idealized modern vision of what they believe Islam looked like at the time of the prophet (peace be upon him)", regardless of whether or not that vision is based on the classical interpretations of Islam. "As per the mosque example, according to the classical texts women used to pray directly behind men, and now they are being boxed away into small corners of the mosque and encouraged to pray at home. The argument that is being used to justify this practice in some mosques is that "today there is more fitnah/sin"; therefore implying that we have to re-interpret Islam for modern, albeit corrupt, historical time period."

People have to be aware of where their ideologic reasoning leads them, same as when one studies socialism/fascism, two spectrum of the same line of reasoning.

I myself, do not support a reformation of Islam but a reformation of self, and the only revival I engender, is one of knowledge and awareness.

fashion sets to come

2011-01-22T02:21:00.000-08:00

I want to post some fashion sets I made while I was bored for old time's sake, so stay tuned.

Pixie's Big News, and ISLAM: ACCEPTING THE WHOLE PACKAGE

2011-01-16T20:46:00.000-08:00

Asalamu alaykom ramatullahi wa barakato:

First off, thank you ALL for your letters of support pertaining to this post. Keep 'em coming:) InshaAllah everything will happen as it is meant and work itself out with time and dua.

Second, I really, really hope my parents don't read this blog because SOMEONE is likely to try and mess up my life again by telling my non-muslim father who I haven't told yet (and who I'd like to calm with a visit to this beautiful country I am in first)... So YOU-KNOW-WHO, please, if you read this, leave me alone to live my life. Do not try to sabotage my decisions so you can laugh and say "I told you so" taking delight in any difficulty that befalls me. The Qu'ran itself warns Muslims against people like you have exhibited yourself to be, saying: "If something good happens to you, they hurt, and if an affliction befalls you, they say, "We told you so," as they turn away rejoicing." [9:50-52].

That is sign enough for me that I don't [and really shouldn't] take your advice, or trust you, as people who "rejoice in saying I told you so" and when something good happens to me "they hurt" are those who come from the path that leads to fire and away from mercy.

When I told YOU-KNOW-WHO-YOU-ARE I married Y you tried to make my life hell and tried to wreck that marriage, and so many peoples lives were wrapped up in a cat-n-mouse game your wus-wus [whispers of doubts ect] brought upon us.

Boxie, Y, and I, our lives will never, ever be the same. My heart was broken. Her heart was broken. Y cried everytime he prayed. KH feels less than he did before, Allah forgive us all for all that we did wrong, and praise-be-to-Him, for all the understanding and right He subhanhu wa'ta'ala guided us to.

BTW, KH, isn't really the Khaleel of the fictional story in the "how to live like an Omani princess" blog. Only a few incidents therein are even the slightest bit on KH. The events might be similar to what happened to us all, but none of the sentiments are after a certain point. It is a story meant to be exciting. Get over it, and don't read into things too much.

And I don't hate you, I just pity you. And ask Allah to forgive you, and guide you, because despite everything you have wrecked upon yourself and others and all the lies you told me and Y, P, Dr. N, KH et all, ALHAMDULILAH also, our lives will never be the same.

Boxie, Y, and I, we all decided, our lives will be BETTER. And I am so happy YOU-KNOW-WHO-YOU-ARE-IF-YOU-ARE-READING-THIS. My life is good. You just want it to be bad.

Know I am not afraid of you, should you return here, because KH knows you despite the fact that he will always be kind to you, and above all, knows my character to be more than that of what would be my inheritance had you your way. And should you play at legalities and sympathies in an attempt to take my security and friends away from me again, I had a Muslim witness to the curse you put on me, to not be able to concieve any children. They know you for what you are now. Your ability to "see the future" is not your gift, but JINN/demons trying to trick you, either to commit suicide or to give you flase pride, I don't know, and as for anywitchraft from spells and curses, Allah is stronger than His Creation, and I do believe, love is stronger than hate. What Allah wills, no other can disallow or stop, and what Allah does not will, no other can provide or create. I am QUITE content with that, actually ;)

You-know-who-if-you-are-reading this: I still love you. I hope you get better one day, inshaAllah. Know that I am praying for you.

Third, ILH, readers, apparently I was cursed to have an empty womb, but I kinda wanna start a little family so keep me in your duas. I am not a huge power-giver to curses kind of person. Allah can undo any curse or spell wrought, and as I already said, love is waaaaaaaaaay stronger than hate.

Fourth, now YOU-KNOW-WHO is probably reading this part going, why'd you want to write this to internet blog Muslimah readers if you don't want me to go and spread it to your family, but Muslimahs, by their strength of being Muslimahs, even virtual strangers, are closer to me in many ways, than blood can ever attain in its jahliliya.

Fifth, ILH readers who love me for the sake of Allah, and who I love for the sake of Allah, and who love what Allah and His Messenger allowed us, and abstain from what they forbid us by the will of Allah, I want to announce to you something that may make the less knowledgeable of you dislike me, or think I am somehow different from you.

I am no longer the only wife in my marriage. And I am happy Allah has given my husband and I and my new sister-wife the strength to do so, supporting eachother, and wanting for eachother what we want for ourselves. While this kind of marriage suits me better than other sisters as I want a bit-of-away time from being loved (NOT TO DO WITH NOT LIKING SEX ;p) adored protected and amused by my husband, I like to do things that I myself just like to do without that being selfish. {I find it highly selfish of myself to drag a husband around to look at stuff he doesn't like to see ect or to spend time with my girlfriends when he is waiting and wants to spend time with me and can't enjoy those things as much in that position}, and having no Muslim family beyond my husband, really, really like having a Muslim sister to be close to who can help me grow in things, and support the marriage and personal growth.

Some members of our families and friend circles (even the Muslim ones) surely reject this part of Islam, but honestly sisters, when you become a Muslim, or if you are born a Muslim, know that your husband DOES have the right to take another wife in his religion. Fairness wise, the clause does NOT give you the right to determine what is fair. As demonstrated in the sunnah of the Prophet Mohamed and many of the men of the sahaba, fairness is that the man must be able to financially [while the wives have equal rights to things a 2nd-4rth wife can ask for less than the first if she likes], physically [if the wife wants she should get, as if she was an only wife], time-wise [should be equal unless either wife forgoes this], and emotionally [women have different needs so this one varies], provide for all whom he marries. He does not need your permission to do so if he knows he can manage all of the above, on the condition stipulated in the Qu'ran where it allows up to 4 wives: wives should be FROM THE FOLLOWING TYPES OF WOMEN: orphans [an orphan woman in Islam is any woman who has no living Muslim maharam], widows & divorcees with children who cannot be maintained by the man's sadaqah/charity honorably.

But it is NOT halal to marry without the knowledge of any wife he was married to previous. Marriages must be announced publically or they can cause serrious fitnah, such as accusations of adultery and fornication, which disapate respect, and destory communities and families.

*This marriage works only if a. the man understand his 1st wives mental and emotional strength well enough to gauge if such a marriage would make her suicidal ect or if he'd even be able to do it and sustain it, and if the women behave as Muslims are to act. Muslimahs must accept this part of Islam, they can't just pick and choose, saying "that isn't for me and I couldn't do it."

Did you know? Um Salamah (one of the mothers of the believers) TURNED down the Prophet SAW's original marriage proposal (after having previously turned down marriage proposals from both Abu Bakr & Umar) saying she couldn't do it "because she was a jealous woman."? He told Hind bint Banu Makhzum Abu Umayyah (aka Um Salamah): "then pray to Allah for Him to remove your jealousy". She then accepted. And as we can see from studying the seerah, [the history of Islam while the Prophet was alive], she was very happy.

Though a woman in Islam IS allowed to seek divorce if she cannot reconcile herself to being in a marriage with more than one wife besides herself, her husband has not committed a sin against her in the religion if he does not reject her or favour the other wife over her. But in the case of divorce, a woman CANNOT ask her husband to divorce her for expedience or family or tribal custom, as the husband IS NOT ALLOWED TO divorce his wife, in order to marry another. That IS HARAAM from him.

My husband will be the first to say, it is INCREDIBLY hard, and not really something that he wanted. I am a rare woman in that I may have wanted him to do so more than he did. Being emotionally fair to one woman is hard (knowing what she needs to feel secure and loved), and financially and physically it means he might have to work twice as hard as other men.
But make sure you marry a man knowing he KNOWS the responsibilities, is a good fair and just men fearing Allah, in the first place, or you will find yourself in an unfair situation with a husband who rejects you and is unjust.

But do not take it as something against yourself if you cannot fulfill everything in your husband's life, as no person was meant to do that for another, only Allah is that for us. Understand the blessing it can be.

For me, and in my experience, while IT CAN BE A CHALLENGE, I find it more rewarding, and easier for me actually.

And to read what I had written before about the subject previously before allowing myself to be in the situation I quite happily in now:

http://ilovehishmatheblog.blogspot.com/2009/08/when-would-i-consider-this-second-wife.html

PIXIE HERE: Asking for your help

2011-01-11T23:04:00.001-08:00

Dear Longtime Readers:

Some fo you have been with me since the days of Beautiful Muslimah and the Bride Wears Hijab blogs.

I know, of late, I TOTALLY haven't been a consistant blogger, but that's because my life has been crazy. Again, I ask your forgiveness.

And for the first time since I started blogging, I am asking for your help, for me.

I need you to help me if I ever helped you in any way (BE IT HIJAB, something else in Islam) Islamically, through this blog or in IRL, by writing letters saying that you know I am a Muslim, and that I helped you.

No, I don't love to be coated in praise, and I am not asking for these letters because I am some kind of egomaniac, but I am in a position where I have to prove I am (most of the time;) ) a decent muslimah [for some period of time] who is useful to the ummah in some small way, so that I can be granted an oppurtunity that I desperately need.

The situation: I am appealing to someone just, in an unjust situation, to appeal on my behalf for permission to be granted an oppurtunity it is halal and needed in my life, and they suggested I ask my readers to contribute to that appeal.

Please help me if I:

a.) ever encouraged you when you had weak Iman.
b.) answered a question you needed to know the answer to about women's role in Islam or otherwise.
c.) helped you make the decision to make your shahada
d.) helped you be strong enough to wear your hijab, be it a scarf, jilbab, or niqab.
e.) Helped you come back to Islam after professed apostasy
f.) [if you are a non-muslim] helped you to be less afraid, and more understanding of Muslims.

Send any such letters to the following email address (if you can write in Arabic, please send your letter in Arabic): bm_pixie@hotmail.com

Jazzakallahkheir, and please forgive me for asking. It is just, that I am not believed on my own.

A reply to a comment that equates adhering to commands in the sunnah, with fanatism and encouraging violence, and about dhimmitude and caliphates

2011-01-09T00:59:00.000-08:00

I recieved the comment below on my post http://ilovehishmatheblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/i-hate-but-that-was-1400-years-ago-as.html about Muslims that want to reject something in Islam using the excuse of something happening 1400 years making an order from Allah or the Messenger invalid or seperate from our beautiful religion of Islam as it is meant to be practiced.

I did not feel great about the comment because I felt publishing of it would require I reply to it but would thus be pointing out the flaws in a known person, but also, since it was signed, and thus adheres to my moderation requirements, I felt I had to, and the sister would be insulted if I didn't. So I made it anonymous as a seperate post. Dear sister, please, I hope you find this to be in line with what you were aiming for.

My response:

Hi {----------}, I am sorry, but your comment made little sense to me.

I do appreciate you taking the time to write your conscience down, but I feel that perhaps English is not your first language or you are not at a highschool level of it [assumption based on the English grammar and your allusion to this news item in regards to your politics and perception of mine from Pakistan way of BBC http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-south-asia-12111831], and you do not understand me well enough (or have enough of a background on Islamci history) to debate the principles of pure tauhid according to the Sunnah & Qu’ran against Sufism.

In addition, I doubt your Islamic understandings due to your misuse of terms for sects and madhabs on other blogs already, such as calling people “fanatics” or “wahabis” for citing authentic ahadith for istilaal, unaware as you are that no Muslim is a “wahabi”. These are my assumptions on the evidences presented, and may Allah guide me, ameen.

Knowing your limitations thus, it would be unfair for me to engage in an attempt of Islamic discourse with you. Debate in ignorance [and you are uninformed as evidences by a continuous or even purposeful misuse of terms] leads to hurt feelings and rash judgments, and separation among the Muslims. That would be a sin on my part I am not enthused to carry to the grave and be punished for, and certainly not to do so publically in the comments section. Thus, your name was removed from the comment.

Since I had nowhere else to appeal to your conscience but the comments bar, I will answer your concerns thusly, as they address the miseducation and misdirection of many.

First, I apologize for your disappointment in my blog. As I understand it, you do not understand me at all. I forgive you for accusing me of a murderous idealogy, when you wrote:
“Is pixie any better than someone who killed Governor Taseer in Pakistan? How much time will it take for person with such ideology to hold guns than just words.”

Firstly, to explain your erred reasoning, my [Pixie here] belief is that Governor Taseer was murdered http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-south-asia-12111831 .

Your perception of my Islam is biased with your cultural/social politics and miseducation, common with some of the Pakistani sufi community, and relatively illiterate (as per Islamic texts) new converts in the sufi communities [I am generalizing, note, not all Sufis come with these hang ups and I've met some profound and educated ones], same goes for this prevalence among anyone unversed in the Seerah/Prophet's life and Islamic History:

I, [Pixie, who you would, abusing/misusing the term, label “Wahabi”], believe Governor’s Taseer killer is a murderer because

A. Taseer’s murderer did not kill Taseer in the defense of his life, or in defense of his personal property.

B. If Taseer were guilty of a crime in his religion (which there is no evidence of, to my opinion and education, that he ever WAS) any criminal to Islam in Shariah must have a trial, he cannot just be “killed”. Even if the person you kill WAS guilty according to Shariah, if they are not tried and sentenced ACCORDING to shariah, then the person that killed them IS ALSO A MURDERER.

C. Violence/killing and treason have nothing to do WITH blasphemy in Salafism/Islam of the Prophet’s time. Yes, there are conditions in Shariah law for apostates being killed, this means in Shariah, there are DIFFERENT CONDITIONS OF BLASPHEMY, but never, in cases of true blasphemy in the Seerah, was an earthly punishment cleaved out by men and their rule in Shariah. The punishment for blasphemy is apostasy with Allah Himself. I personally, think that’d be punishment enough. As I posted here http://ilovehishmatheblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/islam-as-house-judging-intentions-of.html Muslims CANNOT, in Shariah, render judgements, or punishments, on perceived intentions, ONLY ACTIONS.

My personal opinion is, admiration for Mr. Taseer’s defense of the Christian woman accused of Blasphemy http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-south-asia-11930849 because, as I stated, she did not have a court case under Islamic Shariah authority, and in all cases of blasphemy, even if PROVEN by action or admittance, there is no earthly punishment, AND FURTHER that, grounds are to allow the blasphemer repentance.

I do believe he stood up for the unjust charges labeled at a non-Muslim woman, the way a Muslim living in the example of the Salafi period exampled. May Allah grant him peace, and bless him for that, ameen.

Also, nowhere on this blog, or in any of my thoughts or musings, written or unwritten, have I ever, or will I ever, condone murder, or anything contrary to shariah, such as trials not recognized by Allah and His Just laws. If I linked to ALL of my posts, you tell me where my ideology allows for murder, or violence. I am all for saving lives, actually, my favourite ayah in the Qu'ran, the one that drew me most to Islam is “The man who kills a man kills the life of mankind. And the man that saves the life of a man, it is as [to Allah] if they have saved all of mankind.”

You are right, I do believe the "Holy Quran is so clear about what makes true Islamic Nation" and that you fail to "understand why they allow Minorities, why they take goods from countries that don't call themselves Islamic."

If you study the seerah, which is, the Prophet Mohamed's, peace and blessings be upon him, life, you'll know that it is part of the sunnah for the Caliphate to trade, even with the non-Muslims, as was done with the Christians and Jews expelled from the Hijaaz by an order of Rasoolulah Mohamed issued near the end of his life. And during his life, the Muslims always traded with the Quraysh, even though they were Mushirkeen. This is not disallowed in Islam, and does not discredit a Muslim nation or Caliphate whatsoever according to Shariah and the authentic sunnah. "Why they have trade connections?" you ask/ wonder/ ponder. Because it is necessary that the Muslims trade and gain what is beneficial to them.

You are most modest and correct to write "I fail to understand why they allow Minorities". Islam allows minorities [exception being the Islamic Arabian Pennisula aka the Hijaaz], because, beyond the Hijaaz, during the Salafi period (the first three generations of Islam, and thus closest to that which was practiced by Prophet Mohamed, peace and blessings be upon him, non-Muslims were [and remain, provided we ever have a functioning Caliphate again] permitted to practice their religions and keep their own governments without loosing citzenship. Muslims of this day and age, of enough education to understand the way a dhimmi government works, wonder why a Western/Eurpean government cannot accomodate them thusly, as they had accomodated Non-Muslims in the height of their historical influence.

In Islamic dhimmitude, so long as the dhimmi (minority) pays the required tax/ or renders military services in times of need in the form of goods, or physical assistance, one's religion, and own laws regarding marriage, divorce, inheritance, ect can be practiced.

Nowadays, Muslims in non-Muslim countries would be in the position of the "dhimmi" the way the early Sahaba were in Mecca before hijrah to Medina, when they were of small numbers, and not enabled to practice their religion or govern themselves by shariah under the rule of the Quraysh tribe.

***For ANY Muslim who does not understand what I am not talking about, please try to get your hands on a copy of the book "When the Moon Split" or "The Sealed Nectar" so that you have an ounce of understanding before you try to delve into Caliphates or Dhimmitude or even sects***

Some Muslims, in the Muslims majority countries, and those in the West, do not understand the difference between the Shariah ruling periods for Muslims. As you stated, these Muslims "want to follow shariah law" but at the same time, they do not understand exactly how it applies to them. It has nothing to do with "have high birth rate, avoid contraceptives" so I scratch my head at that one. Since they want Shariah law but do not understand how it applies to them, I agree with you fully when you state: "Backclash is imperative. "

You wrote: "my friends say that non muslims are just Islamophobes, but when I read ur blog I felt why not."

My blog is for a Muslim audience though I do understand it is accessible for non-Muslims. That is why I am willing to take the time to comment back when someone has misunderstood me, or a limited understanding of the topic in general. My blog has nothing on it to scare non-Muslims. All laws on it are for Muslims to be aware for themselves, and for non-Muslims, to know there is no compulsion in religion, that true understanding of Shariah and submitting to the will of Allah is a beautiful, freeing, spiritual, freeing thing, with guidance in all matters of life, from past to present. Unless, of course, one understands it, intentionally, or unintentionally.

The thing about non-Muslims living in a Muslim majority country under Shariah law as Dhimmitude is that they prefer that right to citizenship and self government in their religious laws not contrary to overtaking the rights of Islam in Shariah, over moving somewhere else. Muslims also, should veiw this as a good thing, since it is in this manner, that dawah is given, and people are invited to Islam.

What is misunderstood by the cries for a Caliphate and the establishment of Dhimmitudes, is that, well, there are three stages for the ummah, and the establishment of a Caliphate and a Dhimmitude is only the last one.

Nowhere seems capable or near the last stage at the moment in any supportable way.

Muslims such as yourself, "born in America" can be in the first [but mainly, for American Muslims] the second stages of Islam for the Ummah.

The first stage, is when you are a minority, and very afraid for your own life, and just practicing your religion leads you to be tortured. In this case, it is just your job to recite Qu'ran to yourself, and pray, and you are allowed to keep quiet about Islam from those you feel will harm you. As when the Prophet Mohamed, peace and blessings be upon him, started sharing the message of Islam just with those who are closest to him.

The second stage, is when there is an actual community of Muslims, and they are safe from harm. It is here, that Muslims must study and SHARE knowledge with eachother, gaining as much as they can, and work to perfect their faith and understanding of tauhid and other basic principles of Islam, and also, where they practice their Islam openly, and invite others to the blessed fold of Islam. This if often, little enacted upon, in Muslim majority countries, and such is the shameful state our Ummah is in.

The third stage, is when almost everybody in a land has already accepted Islam. It is here, that dhimmitudes are JUSTLY according to Shariah, established, and shariah law is enacted upon by the Muslims upon themselves. It is here, and only at this stage, that they find it possible to form a Caliphate.

Alas, sadly, today---:Muslim majority countries do not have the followers of knowledge and adhearence, to truly want Shariah law, or be able to support it. The countries practicing Shariah these days, are only practicing parts or Shariah, not all of it, and so the systems are unjust, and the populations, too often ill-informed, or rendered powerless by the corrupt application of punishments from the shariah without the protections of the shariah, to remedy the situation they are in. I also "...feel sorry for [the] sad state of today's world and also sad that [knowledge of] Islam... is dying and people still feel peace!! [Sorry, I added, what would be my ammendments to your comment].

You might, "personally find this all useless" since you personally find it okay to be "questioning Quran where it appears non humanity driven" but it is the duty of the believing Muslim to believe in the Qu'ran and to obey its Messenger, and to seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave, and forbid what is evil, and enjoin what is good, so I do not find it pointless in the slightest. It is as the Muslims originally did, as they were guided to by their legitamate Prophet, and you, as a Muslim, must believe that Prophet, Mohamed sallalahu alahi wa salaam, was guided by God/Allah, else, I guess, we should be having a different sort of conversation. ***Amendment to that***: Though I totally believe in questioning as means to derive understanding, not questioning as a form of dismissal of the Qu'ran as an imperfect source.

Don't worry. ;). Even if we did have a different conversation, I firmly believe blasphemy is a punshiment of apostasy before Allah, not man, so you'd be safe from this "fanatic with [a] good command over English".:D

And here, is the original comment, rendered anonymous:

Hi Pixie,almost after 6-7 months I tried checked this blog and was really disappointed. Is pixie any better than someone who killed Governor Taseer in Pakistan? How much time will it take for person with such ideology to hold guns than just words. If Holy Quran is so clear about what makes true Islamic Nation, I fail to understand why they allow Minorities, why they take goods from countries that don't call themselves Islamic. Why they have trade connections? Many of my friends say that non muslims are just Islamophobes, but when I read ur blog I felt why not. Non muslims feel insecure, they allow muslims in non muslim majority countries. there muslims want to follow shariah law, have high birth rate, avoid contraceptives as that makes them pure and true muslims. Backclash is imperative. But as I and you clearly know nothing like no trade will happen, it is mutually beneficial where money is considered. Nothing like no muslims in secular countries can happen, then it becomes a point of concern. I am born in America and my christian friends do feel i am taking their jobs and on top of that I want my laws!! Well I personally find this all useless Pixie. I feel rather than believing in God and questioning Quran where it appears non humanity driven. I feel you are nothing but a fantic with good command over English. I feel sorry for sad state of today's world and also sad that Islam today is more fanatic, sufism is dying and people still feel peace!! Anyway you didnt force me to read this blog but my conscience forced me to comment. Ameen.

How does Pixie study ahadith on ILOVEHISHMA

2011-01-08T23:11:00.000-08:00

I recently recieved this comment from zeinabiyya-thank you zeinabiyya:):

Salam,

Just thought I would point out that just because you studied something in university doesn't mean it's the only way of classifying ahadith, for instance. When we Shia debate with Sunnis we use Sunni ahadith to contest them, even if we don't admit to these ahadith ourselves, simply because our ahadith do not hold any weight in your eyes. It would be stupid to expect us all to view your ahadith, on the other hand, as the "right ones" simply because you think so yourself.

It seems you don't know much about the issue, however.

Anyway, the best of luck to you in your endeavor! It seems like it will be very interesting, as your blog is in general, and I'm curious to see how it will turn out.

wassalam.

Wa alaikom as salaam ramatullahi wa barakto Zeinabiyya. Thank you for the comment, as it poses a question, or marks an assumption I am sure is likely to come up.

On "I Love Hishma", in the past, not in all things, but in many, I have used Sunni Ahadith, whether or not I had personally researched their narrations or not. Only issues that seemed in doubt to me, did I take the personal trouble to study the Arabic in depth, or to research the time period of origin, and history of the chain of narration from all available sources. If anyone contests with me past writings, I am able to clarify.

In the following series, we intend to write about sects from ALL the points of veiw, using the evidences of those points of veiw. For example, I invited my shiite contributers to use their hadiths, as well the hadiths necessary for sunnis as proof, as well as Ibadhis to use their hadiths, and I am still looking for a Qu'ran only Muslima who wants to contribute, as far as any of these may be from what I personally follow. Same goes for Sunni hadith. When I write that section, it will often be using wholly the majority Sunni opinion.

But in my personal thoughts sections, seperate from the sects overveiw, in what to include, I am not using Sunni fiqh to study ahadith, or shiite, or Ibadhi. I am using only ACCEDEMIC. What you learn if you study history, any history. I will be using historical jurisprudence, not Islamic jurisprudence, in the manner of a science, so to be unbiased. It will be a more thorough agenda.

The reason before this was not done on matters I deemed myself sure one, was a. I did not have the time or resources to devote to such a study, and b. I went with what I believed to be the most correct opinion from the majority in things I was unsure of.

But as I always stated, it is the duty of the Muslim, to first, of course, consult those they trust with knowledge if there are things they are in doubt of, but beyond that, if they are able to, it is incombent upon them to seek out the sources of that knowledge, even to PROVE that source. To know it beyond any doubt. It is hard to do this in all things all the time, but when one is able to, they must.

So I will be using purely the Western science of History (which is not a perfect system in itself) to come to my final opinions, before mixing faith as well, in. The Sunni section will be sunni, the ibadhi, ibadhi, and shiite, shia, but to be honest, I do study all sources when I am able to. I only stay away from things I have doubt in if I do not have time or means to remedy that doubt.

Islam AS A HOUSE, & judging the intentions of others & judging the actions of others, and the big difference therein

2011-01-04T02:25:00.000-08:00

I recently just heard a good lecture from a Shiekh about one's Islam being a house. I haven't finished the series of lectures but I wanted to share this little bit with you:

And the lecturer said, every house has a foundation first. Without a strong foundation, no house can stand. With a bad foundation, the house will not stand long.

In Islam, the foundation of that house is "tauhid". Tauhid is belief and practice and action of "la illaha il allah, muhumad abdu rasoolulah". It is the thing that makes you a Muslim/Muslimah or not. You have to testify and live believing/knowing "there is no God but Allah alone, and Muhummad is Allah's servant/slave and messenger."

You have to believe this, to be a Muslimah/Muslim.

The thing about tauhid, like the thing about the foundation of a house is, the foundation for the house of Islam (an Individual's belief and intention to understand tauhid) cannot be seen by others. Only by Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala.

Which is why in Islam, we are never allowed to judge the intentions of other Muslims, only their ACTIONS. Which is a mistake many Muslims these days are making when we jump into the the subject and issue of sects in Islam. ***I admit, before a more thorough Islamic education, this was also a mistake of my own.***

But what makes me feel better [and maybe you also, if you've ever been rowing the same boat] is that I am not the *only* Muslim to have made this mistake. :):

Usama ibn Zayd said, "The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, sent us to al-Huraqa, a sub-tribe of Juhayna, and we came upon the people in the morning at their springs. A man of the Ansar and I overtook one of their men. When we descended on him, he said, "There is no god but Allah." The Ansari held back from him, but I stabbed him with my spear until I had killed him. When we arrived in Madina, that reached the Prophet and he said, "O Usama, did you kill him after he had said, "There is no god but Allah"?" I said, "Messenger of Allah, he was only trying to save himself out of fear from our weapons." He said, 'Did you then split open his heart so that you know whether he truly meant it when he said it or not?' He continued to repeat it until I wished that I had only become Muslim on that day." [Agreed upon]

Jundub ibn 'Abdullah reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, sent an expedition of the Muslims against some of the idolaters and they encountered them. There was one of the idolaters who, whenever he wanted to aim for one of the Muslims, went straight for him and killed him and then one of the Muslims went for him and killed him. We heard that it was Usama ibn Zayd. When he raised his sword, [the man] said, 'There is no god but Allah,' but he killed him anyway. When the man bringing news of the victory came to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, he questioned him. He told him what had happened, even telling him the story of the man and what he had done. He summoned him, questioned him and said, 'Why did you kill him?' He said, 'Messenger of Allah, he had hurt the Muslims and killed so-and-so and so-and-so,' and he named a group. 'I attacked him. When he saw my sword, he said, "There is no god but Allah"' The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, 'Did you kill him?' He said, 'Yes.' He said, 'What will you do with 'There is no god but Allah' when it comes on the Day of Rising?' He said, 'Messenger of Allah, ask forgiveness for me.' He said, 'What will you do with 'There is no god but Allah' when it comes on the Day of Rising?' He did not add anything to his words: 'What will you do with 'There is no god but Allah' when it comes on the Day of Rising?'" [Muslim]

The foundation of the House of Islam is Tauhid, and belief and intention of tauhid, cannot be seen by others.

As the Sheikh continued, Tauhid is the foundation of the house, and those who correct their tauhid as is spelt out plainly in the Qu'ran and authentic sunnah as agreed upon by those who can verify the histories and narrations, will have a strong foundation to build the walls of their house upon. The House of Islam has four walls. Those walls are 1.) salat, 2.) paying zakat, 3.) fasting the month of Ramadan, 4.) making hajj if at all humanly possible.

If your understanding of Tauhid is incorrect, you will have walls that sink in places, or that are not strong enough to hold up a roof, or the wiring and plumbing [the rest of the Muslim ummah] will not fit in your house. If you do not believe in Tauhid, you will have no foundation whatsoever, and you will have walls that do not stand at all, unless you stand behind them before other's eyes, propping them up, like a cardboard set on a stage.

And the Sheikh went on to say, that the Muslim Caliphate, which is commanded upon all of the Muslims, is the roof of the House of Islam. Without a firm foundation in tauhid, without quality walls designed in the manner commanded of mankind in the Qu'ran [including Islamic knowledge thereof] that include the wiring and plumbing of all facets of the ummah, then that roof, that roof will not stand.

These days we have Muslims trying to build walls without foundations. These days we have Muslims trying wire the ummah to a roof that has nothing to rest itself upon.

The foundation is very important. Without it, the walls are to be dust that was nothing.

Abu 'Abdullah Tariq ibn Ashyam said "I heard the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, say, 'If anyone says, "There is no god but Allah" and rejects everything that is worshipped other than Allah, his property and life are inviolate and his reckoning is in the hands of Allah Almighty." [Muslim]

Abu Ma'bad al-Miqdad ibn al-Aswad said, "I asked the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, 'What do you think if I meet a man of the unbelievers and we fight and he strikes one of my hands with his sword and cuts it off and then takes shelter from me behind a tree and says, "I have surrendered to Allah." Should I kill him, Messenger of Allah, after he has said that?' He said, 'Do not kill him.' I said, 'Messenger of Allah, he cut off one of my hands and then said it after he cut it off!' He said, 'Do not kill him. If you kill him, then he is in the position you were in before you killed him and you are in the position he was in before he said the words he said.'" [Agreed upon]

We cannot see the foundation other Muslims are building upon, i.e we cannot judge their intentions or belief, but we can percieve the aboveground structure, their salat, their zakat, their fasting, and their effort to make hajj, as an indication of the existance and quality of their foundation. As fasting can be done for Allah alone, and hajj is allowed to be left off for those who are not able to, salat and zakat are two parts of Islam [ACTIONS, NOT INTENTIONS] Muslims may judge other Muslims on, because the Qu'ran says:

"If they repent [say the shahada] and establish the prayer and pay zakat, let them go on their way." (9:5)

Which means, we may judge Muslims for the actions of NOT PRAYING AND NOT PAYING ZAKAT. This is reinforced by various ahadith.

Ibn 'Umar reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "I have been commanded to fight people until they testify that there is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah and establish the prayer and pay the zakat. If they do that, their lives and property are protected from me except for the right of Islam, and their reckoning is in the hands of Allah." [Agreed upon]

Abdullah ibn 'Utba ibn Mas'ud reported that he heard 'Umar ibn al-Khattab say, "Some people were dealt with by the revelation in the time of the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace. The revelation has ceased. Now we deal with you according to what is clear to us from your actions. If anyone shows us good [doing the things enjoined upon him by the Qu'ran and the Messenger of Allah], we trust him and honour him. We know nothing of his inward. Allah will call him to reckoning in respect of his inward. If anyone shows us evil [partaking in that was forbidden to humanity in the Qu'ran and evidenced in the sunnah], we do not trust him and do not believe him, even if he says that his inward is good." [al-Bukhari]

Thus Muslims are forbidden to judge eachother's intentions, only their actions.

I hear alot of Muslims judging eachother's intentions, because they have NO KNOWLEDGE WHATSOEVER of another person's actions, or of their own religion they are making judgement's in the name of. That has to stop.

THE CURE IS TAUHID UNDERSTOOD<>

Maybe one day the HOUSE OF ISLAM could have a roof again, if we could do that.

It's a beautiful dream, now isn't it?

Love you all for the sake of Allah,

-Pixie

Ilovehishma

My Baby Girl is Here, Alhamdulilah

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The Technical Meaning of the Term "Khawarij" pt. 1

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